‘New Boss’
Season 5, Episode 20 - Aired March 19, 2009
As Michael's fifteenth anniversay at Dunder Mifflin approaches, a new boss, Charles Miner, arrives from Corporate with a view to cutting costs.
Quote from Michael Scott
Michael Scott: All right, let me introduce you to some of the troops. Accounting, front and center. Come on up here, I'd like you to meet somebody. This is the accounting department.
Charles: Hey, I come from accounting, too.
Michael Scott: Oh, wow. Nerd alert. This is Oscar Martinez. He is Latino. And he just got out of a long-term relationship with a man, Gil, who broke his heart. But he didn't bring any of that into work. It did not affect his job performance whatsoever. And I'm very proud of him for that.
Charles: Hey, Oscar. It's good to meet you.
Michael Scott: This little hell-raiser is Angela. She has slept with a bunch of different guys in the office. One over there, in the orange.
Andy: Hey-o!
Michael Scott: Hey-o! Where's the other?
Charles: You know, Michael, I don't need to know everyone's sexual history.
Michael Scott: Well, perfect. Because we have now arrived at Kevin, and he has no sexual history.
Quote from Michael Scott
Michael Scott: I am thrilled that the new boss has taken such an active interest in all of the responsibilities that I'm supposed to have. Thrilled.
Quote from Michael Scott
Michael Scott: [on the phone] David, it was my understanding that I was not going to be managed.
David: What gave you that idea?
Michael Scott: It was my understanding.
David: I see.
Michael Scott: Why don't we just leave that position vacant? Truth be told, I think I thrive under a lack of accountability.
Quote from Michael Scott
David: [on the phone] Look, Michael. Charles is very qualified. Get to know him. I really think the two of you are gonna make a great team.
Michael Scott: But the branch is still mine?
David: You're still the branch manager, yes. And if you need anything else at all, just let Charles know.
Dwight K. Schrute: Ask about the party.
Michael Scott: Right. Are you coming to my 15th anniversary party?
David: I'll give it my best shot.
Dwight K. Schrute: No, the other thing.
Michael Scott: If we hired Cirque de Soleil as salaried employees, will that help us with the year-end tax stuff? [silence]
Dwight K. Schrute: You think he hung up?
David: No.
Quote from Michael Scott
Michael Scott: You're not from paper?
Charles: No.
Michael Scott: Does David know this?
Charles: Yeah, he knows. He just wants a good manager.
Michael Scott: Well, that actually is a excellent segue into really what is my only point. And that is- I don't need to be managed, Charles. And if you want to pick up some tips, observing here and taking them to the other branches, it's all good. But... Jan would mostly come by when she was super horny. And Ryan would come by to visit his parents and do laundry. So... Are we clear?
Charles: That's not how I plan on doing things.
Michael Scott: Okay. Okay. Well, I'll just bounce that off David, see if it comes back.
Charles: I'll tell David what he needs to know. Sorry. David wants it this way.
Michael Scott: Well, Whatever David wants.
Quote from Michael Scott
Receptionist: [answering the phone] David Wallace's office.
Michael Scott: Hi, Stephanie. Michael Scott again. I just spoke with Michael Scotch. The son's going to be returned, everything's fine.
Quote from Michael Scott
Kevin: Michael, I just realized that I used the 2008 calendar to do the spreadsheets for January and February. I may need to come in this weekend to fix it.
Michael Scott: Do some overtime? You wanna do some overtime this weekend? You know what, Kevin, I applaud your initiative. Yes, you may-
Charles: Uh, no. Sorry, Michael. No, Kevin, right? I'm gonna need you to do that during office hours.
Kevin: Okay. Okay.
Michael Scott: Kevin, this is my branch. You don't ask Charles, you ask me. I say "approved".
Charles: That's not the way it's going to work.
Michael Scott: Yes, it is.
Charles: No, it is not.
Michael Scott: No, it is not.
Charles: Okay, so we're on the same page, great.
Michael Scott: Okay, so we're on the same page, great.
Charles: Okay, Michael, what are you doing?
Michael Scott: Okay, Michael, what are you doing?
Charles: No, seriously.
Michael Scott: No, seriously.
Charles: How old are you?
Michael Scott: How old are you?
Quote from Michael Scott
Charles: Five-years-old.
Michael Scott: Five-years-old.
Andy: Dude, stop.
[The employees beg Michael to stop]
Charles: That's great.
Michael Scott: That's great.
Charles: I'm going to walk away.
Michael Scott: I'm going to walk away.
Andy: You need to stop doing that.
Michael Scott: I'm kidding around! Wow. Relax everybody. It was just a joke. It's fine. Boy, so touchy. PPC, let's continue our meeting in the conference room.
Quote from Jim
Jim: All right, Charles, I got to be honest, I think we really got off on the wrong foot here. And truth be told, I'm a smart guy. And a hard-worker and a great number two for the office.
Charles: Number two?
Jim: Second in command to Michael.
Charles: Oh, I didn't know that position existed.
Jim: Oh, that's because at first, it was a made up position for Dwight, just to make him feel better. Assistant to the regional manager. But then he lost that and Michael gave it to me.
Charles: So you're the assistant to the regional manager?
Jim: Assistant regional manager.
Charles: Any responsibilities come with it?
Jim: No, not exactly.
Charles: Do you want to keep this made up position? It's important to you?
Jim: All right. I will just- I will let you get back to it.