‘Michael Scott Paper Company’
Season 5, Episode 23 - Aired April 9, 2009
It's the first day at work for Michael, Pam and Ryan at the Michael Scott Paper Company. Meanwhile, Jim isn't sure about an instruction from Charles.
Quote from Ryan
Ryan: [on the phone] Yeah. I wish my iPod could make phone calls. No, I don't want an iPhone. I know what an iPhone is.
Quote from Jim
Charles: You started on that rundown yet?
Jim: Oh, this is just something I'm taking a break with.
Charles: Oh.
Jim: I will get back to the rundown, uh, right now.
Charles: Okay, great.
Jim: Hey, you know what? Do you have a rundown that I could take a look at, just so I know what type of rundown you're looking for?
Charles: Just keep it simple.
Jim: Keeping it simple, that's what I'm doing. But I am working hard on this one. Real hard.
Charles: You're working hard? On this?
Jim: No. Not too hard. Not harder than I should.
Charles: Right. I mean why work harder than you should.
Jim: [chuckles] No, I....
Quote from Pam
Pam: Hey, Charles.
Charles: Hey, Pam.
Pam: I know you're a very busy man so I'll cut right to the chase. I'd like my old job back.
Charles: I don't know what to tell you. The job's been taken.
Pam: Um, well, I could come back as a salesman. I have experience now.
Charles: Um.
Pam: Or I could come back as your personal assistant. You know? Sort your mail, set your appointments. I know all the people.
Charles: Yeah, I know.
Pam: Personal shopper?
Charles: No.
Pam: Well it was great catching up with you. And I'll see you around the building.
Charles: Okay.
[aside to camera:]
Pam: I'm just gonna sit here for a little bit longer if that's okay. The air smells so good. I don't remember it smelling so good. The chairs are so comfortable.
Quote from Michael Scott
Michael Scott: Get your free pancakes. They are delicious. They are nutritious. They are complimentary. Young sir, would you like a free pancake?
Ryan: I'm texting. I don't want to get my fingers sticky.
Michael Scott: Ryan, enough with the texting machine. Come on. And tuck in your shirt, you're the face of this company.
Quote from Pam
Michael Scott: Hey, Pam.
Pam: Hey.
Michael Scott: You sorta disappeared there for a while. Where ya been?
Pam: Yeah, I needed to take care of some stuff.
Michael Scott: Yeah?
Pam: That's as specific as I'd like to be.
Michael Scott: Well, at least you're still being honest with me.
Quote from Jim
Jim: There's the rundown you asked for. I may have expanded some areas that you weren't prepared for.
Charles: Great. Fax that to everyone on the distribution list.
Jim: Yeah, sure. Do you want to look at it first?
Charles: Do I need to?
Jim: No. No, I just wanted to make sure, it was in the same format. So that distribution list is gonna be my...?
Charles: What's that?
Jim: The one I have. I'll use the one I have.
[later, to camera at the copier:]
Jim: Just faxing. My Dad. A rundown.
Quote from Pam
Pam: Dunder Miff... Michael Scott Paper Company, this is Pam. Oh, hi Russell from the pancake luncheon, how are you? Well, we'd like to do business with you too! How can I make that happen?
Ryan: Keep going.
Michael Scott: Tell them we have free delivery!
Pam: We already offered free delivery!
Michael Scott: They don't know that!
Pam: Um, I can offer you free delivery on any order that you place today. Okay, twenty boxes? I can do... just a second. I can do 20 boxes at 43 dollars a box. Great!
Ryan: Write it down.
Michael Scott: Give him a guarantee.
Pam: A guarantee of what?
Michael Scott: Just say the word.
Pam: And I guarantee, that you will be satisfied! 'Cause your satisfaction is our guarantee! We guarantee it. We look forward to doing business with you, too. Thank you Russell.
Quote from Andy
Andy: Literally every song is better a cappella. Name a song.
Dwight K. Schrute: Cherry Pie, Warrant.
Andy: Better a cappella!
Dwight K. Schrute: No! Really?
Andy: Yeah. Name another.
Dwight K. Schrute: Enter Sandman, Metallica.
Andy: Better a cappella.
Dwight K. Schrute: Rebel Yell, Billy Idol.
Andy: Aw!! Way better a cappella
Dwight K. Schrute: Really?
Andy: Yeah.
Quote from Stanley
Michael Scott: Oh, hey. Stanley, Phyllis. Come on in. Welcome, welcome. Let me give you the tour.
Stanley: I get it. [To Phyllis] You need to see more?
Phyllis: It's really cute.
Michael Scott: Thank you. You remember Ryan. [Stanley laughs deeply] And Pam is around here somewhere.
Stanley: She's upstairs talking to Charles.
Michael Scott: What for?
Stanley: I don't know.