Andy: Hit about 1,200 balls last night in preparation for today, so hands are a little tender. It's actually not funny at all. It's incredibly painful.

Michael Scott: Wha- What is this?
Pam: Piece of paper.
Michael Scott: This isn't Dunder Mifflin paper. It's some sort of Pendleton crap.
Pam: Well, I think they'll get the spirit of it.
Michael Scott: Pam, Pam, Pam, Pam, Pam, Pam! We're dying here. I want you to go back to the office, and I want you to get the real stuff. I want you to get ultra white card stock.
Pam: Are you serious?
Michael Scott: Yes. And don't call me Shirley.

Pam: [on the phone] How's it going?
Jim: You know. We'll see. We'll see.
Pam: Well, I just drove 20 miles round trip back to the office to get Michael a single sheet of white paper. So, I could have just had them fax it to me, I guess.
Jim: Oh, I like you.
Pam: Talk to you later?
Jim: Yeah, all right. Bye.

Michael Scott: Justin is the ugly girl in the movie who takes off her glasses, and she's hot. And you realize that she was always hot, she was just wearing glasses, and that you were the blind one. He's the most important thing in my life right now.

Jim: You know, it's a tough thing seeing a grown man take six shots to get out of a sand trap, but I had to give Phil credit for not quitting. Which is what I told him. I also told him that I don't quit either and I'd call him every single day until he gave me his business. Which he then did, after fifteen minutes of me blocking his car. So I am now his paper supplier. And I shot a 102 today, so I'm feelin' pretty good.

Pam: So many memories in this old gym. Pretending I have PMS so I didn't have to play volleyball. Pretending I have PMS so I didn't have to play basketball. Those were the days.

Pam: I only brought the one.
Michael Scott: Are you mental?
Pam: Michael, do you remember you specifically told me to only bring one sheet of paper? You said it only takes one sheet to make a difference. And I said, "Are you sure, Michael?" And you said, "Pam, Pam, Pam." And then you sneezed in my tea. And then you said, "Don't worry. It's just allergies." Do you remember that?
Michael Scott: I don't.

Creed: [on the phone] Hiya, pumpkin. It's Creed. Say we're gonna ditch this bitch. You in?
Angela: No.
Creed: You out? [shouting] Pumpkin's out! Let's go, gang.

Kevin: I'm gonna take this petty cash that I got from Oscar and turn it into next month's rent.

Michael Scott: Hey remember what we talked about in the car on the way out? "Only the best and the brightest"?
Pam: He's nice, and he seems interested.
Michael Scott: He's totally wrong, Pam. [to Justin] Hi. How you doin'? Listen, I don't think that a handsome, funny, smart, funny-looking kid like you should limit himself. You could do whatever you wanna do. You could be a classy janitor or a cashier with dignity or a migraine worker. Maybe for you, paper should be more of a hobby.
Justin: Sorry for wasting your time.
Michael Scott: Oh, no problem. And he signed! He put his name on the piece of- Okay, that was supposed to be a blank canvas on which to put their hopes and dreams, and he just made it into a stupid piece of paper. We need another one immediately.
Darryl: Yeah, the booth is lame without it.