Michael Scott: Hey there. So I think I'm done. Gonna head out. Unless you want to chat. Like we were doing earlier.
Jo: Well there's chatting time and there's working time. I'm still on working time.
Michael Scott: Mm? Well, the clock says chatting time, so.
Jo: Well, if you feel like you've done a solid days work...
Michael Scott: Right. What?
Jo: Well, I mean, if you can put your name on this day, and be proud of the amount of work you've done, then, by all means, you should toodle on home.

Dwight K. Schrute: I take full responsibility.
Jo: Who else would be responsible?
Dwight K. Schrute: Pam made me put a banana in my holster.
Pam: You shot a gun off!
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay. Did I make a mistake? Yes. Do I regret the decision that I made? Yes.
Jo: Oh, stop asking yourself easy questions so you can look like a genius.
Dwight K. Schrute: Got it.
Jo: I love you, Dwight. But you don't fit this job.
Dwight K. Schrute: [on the verge of tears] Jo, please... I will -
Jo: No, child. No. It's over. Now I gotta find a replacement for my replacement.

Andy: [Jo's dogs sniffing at his crotch] These sure are pretty dogs.
Jo: They love a good crotch.
Andy: They sure do.
Jo: You should take that as a compliment!
Andy: Oh, I do!

Jo: Hey, I appreciate you reading that statement. You looked pretty up there.
Michael Scott: That was fun.
Jo: I hope your rough patch ends soon.
Michael Scott: Thanks. Today helped.
Jo: Well, give me a shout if I can brighten your life.
Michael Scott: Okay. Hey, you could transfer Holly back from Nashua.
Jo: Let me see what I can do.

Jo: Dwight! Walk me out. Let's talk soon. And stay on top of these people. You gotta admit it, it's nice to have a little power, eh? How's it feel?
Dwight K. Schrute: Jo... I accidentally fired a gun in the office today.
Jo: What?!
Dwight K. Schrute: I am telling you this because I care too much about this job to be blackmailed into doing it poorly. All I've ever wanted was to be manager here. And if you feel that you cannot promote me over this one accident, I understand. But if you think that extortion is worse-
Jo: Shooting is worse! Are you kidding me? It's not even in the same- You shot a gun? What is wrong with you?
Dwight K. Schrute: It was a Beaumont-Adams, if that helps.
Jo: Beaumont-Adams is a girl's gun. That just makes it plain stupid.

Jo: [to Angela] Just choosing seats, not getting married. Chop, chop little onion!

Jo: Let's get Kelly in here to take his place.
Jim: Um, why Kelly?
Jo: 'Cause Gabe's tall and weak. She's short and strong. I'm doing an opposites thing.

Jo: [on video chat] Hey, Buddy. Is it something I said?
Michael Scott: Hello. No. My name's Michael Scott. Hello.
Jo: Oh, hello, Mr. Scott. Pleased to meet you.
Michael Scott: Nice to meet you. We are very excited about the merger with Sabre. I think you have a great accent.
Jo: Aw, thank you. I've been working on it since I was a little girl. To, um, to what do I owe the pleasure of this video chat?
Michael Scott: Well, I am little concerned with all of these changes, to be quite frank. I think we have done things a certain way here at Dunder Mifflin for quite some time, and-
Jo: Pardon. Pardon me, Mr. Scott, but the last time I saw a company as mismanaged as Dunder Mifflin, it was my grandson's snowball company, so you'll excuse me if I prefer that you all adapt to the way that we do things.

Dwight K. Schrute: Jo, may I speak to you for a second?
Jo: Or what? You gonna shoot me?
Dwight K. Schrute: [laughs] Oh, I enjoy laughing at my mistakes, because I've learned so much from them. I'd like to be interviewed for the position.
Jo: I'll interview you right now.
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay.
Jo: Question 1: Ever shot a gun in the office?
Dwight K. Schrute: It's complicated.
Jo: Yeah, but see... it's not.

Gabe: [on video chat] First let me say that I told them everything you wanted me to say, in just the way you wanted me to say it, so...
Jo: Gabe, honey, I love this. I love the sound of your voice. But I really need some new information now.
Gabe: Okay, um, I told the story of your uncle, and I have a feeling that you would have [Michael gesturing behind computer] really been proud of the way... Okay, um...
Jo: Wait a minute, who is it? Who's there? Is there somebody in the room with you? [Michael gesturing "no"] I want to see who it is. Turn me around.
Gabe: I don't- it's just...
Jo: Turn me around. Now.