Michael Scott: Never, ever, ever sleep with your boss. I'm so lucky that Jan and I only got to second base.

Pam: It's weird. Jan used to treat Michael like he was a 10-year old. But lately it's like he's five.

Ryan: I have spent a year here. And I have to commit or get out. So, Dwight's the top salesman in the company and he's taking me on my first sales call today. And, I'm excited.

Ryan: So, what if they're not talking much? Then does it make sense to kind of lead the conversation? You know, just till it gets to a point where they are asking questions? So where is the sales office?
Dwight K. Schrute: When you are ready to see the sales office, the sales office will present itself to you. Your journey begins now.

Pam: Once a year, they bring in a little cart, and they give away free pretzels. It's really not a big deal. To some people it is.

Michael Scott: Productivity is important, but how can I be productive, if I have this one little thing in my brain that I cannot get out? And that one little thing is a soft pretzel. So, I'm just gonna have my soft pretzel, I'll get to work and I'm gonna be super-productive. Look out for me!

Dwight K. Schrute: It smells pretty bad, doesn't it?
Ryan: Uh-huh.
Dwight K. Schrute: It's called bull crap and a client can smell it from a mile away.
Ryan: Gotcha.
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh, hey, I forgot something in my car. I'll be right back.
Ryan: Okay.
[Dwight runs to his car, then drives off]
Ryan: Of course.

Michael Scott: Hey, Phyllis, what are you doing?
Phyllis: I'm just saying hi to Bob.
Michael Scott: No, I think you're cutting in line.
Bob Vance: Well, settle down, Scott.
Michael Scott: No, I'm not gonna settle down.
Stanley: Uh-uh. No way. Uh-huh,
Michael Scott: Get in the back, please.
Stanley: Boo!
Michael Scott: Boo!
Stanley: Back in line.
Michael Scott: Thank you. That's right.
Bob Vance: What a pair of marys.
Stanley: This is pretzel day.

Ryan: Hey, Dwight, you're a great salesman. Can you teach me? Sure, Ryan. I'll make you kneel in cow manure and I'll abandon you in a beet field. Oh, that sounds great, Dwight. I really appreciate that. Thank you so much. A mentor- [Ryan knocks on a farm shed]
Dwight K. Schrute: Congratulations, resourceful salesman. You have passed the second challenge. Welcome to Schrute farm!

Michael Scott: Hi, please tell me you have a sweet pretzel left.
Pretzel Guy: We do.
Michael Scott: Thank God.
Pretzel Guy: And we have 18 different toppings. We have sweet glaze, cinnamon sugar, chocolate, white chocolate, fudge, M&Ms, caramel dip, mint chip, chocolate chip, marshmallows, nuts, toffee nuts, coconut, peanut butter drizzle, Oreo, sprinkles, cotton candy bits and powdered sugar.
Michael Scott: Is there any way that you could do all of them? The works.
Pretzel Guy: You got it.
Michael Scott: All right! Thank you.