Michael Scott: So, what do you do?
Julie: I am an ESL teacher.
Michael Scott: Really?
Julie: Yeah.
Michael Scott: See, I didn't think you could teach that. I thought that was something you were born with. What am I thinking right now?
Julie: Are you thinking that I said 'ESP?'
Michael Scott: Yes. I feel like an idiot. Awesome.
[aside to camera:]
Julie: I was a little nervous when Pam told me he was her boss, but he doesn't act like a boss at all. [laughing] If I had a boss like that, we'd never get anything done.

Pam: Why are you wearing a hat now?
Michael Scott: Guys, come on, I'm on a date. Let me do my thang.
[aside to camera:]
Michael Scott: Hi, I'm date Mike. Nice to meet me. How do you like your eggs in the morning? [tries to wink]

Isabel: Oh, air hockey, basketball, we could play that. Oh, whack-a-mole.
Dwight K. Schrute: Any brothers or sisters?
Isabel: Three brothers.
Dwight K. Schrute: Really?
Isabel: Two are in the Marines, one's a cop.
Dwight K. Schrute: Vegetarian?
Isabel: No. I love meat.
Dwight K. Schrute: What's your blood type?
Isabel: O-negative. Universal donor.
Dwight K. Schrute: Universal donor.

Dwight K. Schrute: Listen, can I talk to you for a second?
Angela: Okay.
Dwight K. Schrute: Look, I've been thinking. We had a good run. We really did. But you don't need to worry about this whole contract thing anymore.
Angela: It's no worry.
Dwight K. Schrute: It's just that we both-we want different things. You know, I want a big family.
Angela: I could see enjoying that.
Dwight K. Schrute: No, no, no, no. I want a big family. Tall. Thick. A big, physically big family. Listen, you go have fun. You're off the hook.
Angela: But we signed the contract.
Dwight K. Schrute: It's dissolved. Don't worry, you're free. Okay? Okay. See you later.

Michael Scott: Hey, you embarrassed my friends in front of me and I'm gonna need you to go back over to the table and apologize.
Bar Manager: Then I am sorry... that I didn't kick you out.
Michael Scott: I am here with my employees. I am here on a date. Hello.
Bar Manager: Well, uh, I'm the manager here, sir.
Michael Scott: Well, it just so happens that I am a manager too. And the way I manage people is that I touch their hearts and souls with humor, with love and maybe a dash of razzle-dazzle. And I don't see that from you.
Bar Manager: Is that how you do it?
Michael Scott: Yes it is. I am writing a book about it.
Bar Manager: Really? How much have you written?
Michael Scott: I've written all of it... in my head.
Bar Manager: Oh.
Michael Scott: If you're really interested, it's called 'Somehow I Manage' and there's going to be a picture of me on the cover, shrugging, with my sleeves rolled up.
Bar Manager: Huh. Have you read Lee Iacocca's? It's a classic.
Michael Scott: Read it? I own it. But no, I have not read it.
Bar Manager: Dude, tonight! You're not going to want to put it down. It's gonna make you want to go out and buy a Chrysler tomorrow.
Michael Scott: I own a Chrysler.

Dwight K. Schrute: With this move, he can't get you.
Isabel: Well, I think that he could counter that move. The Scranton Strangler is a professional strangler.
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh, please. I wish he'd come after me. I would be like- Ah!
Angela: Dwight Schrute! Dwight Kurt Schrute.
Dwight K. Schrute: Sh-what?
Angela: You are hereby served with a summons to appear in Lackawanna County Court.
Dwight K. Schrute: No, no, no. [trying to talk over her] Blah, blah, blah, blah.
Angela: For breach of contract with Angela Noelle Martin.

Dwight K. Schrute: Breathe. Work your core. Come on.
Michael Scott: How many is that?
Dwight K. Schrute: Not counting the last one, 25.
Michael Scott: Count the last one.
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay, 25 and one girl push-up!
Michael Scott: Oh, new record!
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay.
Michael Scott: Oh, what did you do today?
Jim: I made a sale.
Michael Scott: Oh, yeah, sitting on your big fat butt. Alright, that is the number to beat.
Meredith: What do we get if we do 'em?
Michael Scott: My respect. [everyone returns to work] Okay, I'll make it a little more interesting. Anyone who does more than 25 push-ups-
Dwight K. Schrute: And one girl push-up.
Michael Scott: Gets to go home. [everyone starts doing push-ups] Oh! I say dance, they say how high? Here we go.

Michael Scott: Well, it's not exactly fair. He's got all of his weight that's helping him go down.

Oscar: Yeah, we talked this morning and we talked at Christmas. So, a little momentum there. [tries to open office door, locked] Just a couple of hours to kill before work.

Jim: So some of the co-workers were thinking of going out tonight, but I told them-
Pam: [on phone] Yes! Yes! I would love to!
Andy: Ha! Knew it!
Pam: It's been so long since I've been with adults. I am so excited to see everybody. Creed, Ryan. Oh my God, Stanley! Stanley's going to be there. Yes, oh my God!