Michael Scott: All right. All right. This is the way I see it. Yes, I had sex with Jan. And, yes, I did consider Jan to be my girlfriend. However, Jan clearly did not consider me to be her boyfriend. So her actions are completely rightful.
Diane Kelly: Okay, Mr. Scott. It's admirable, the way you defend a woman who is so obviously ambivalent about her relationship with you.
Michael Scott: Thank you very much. You didn't have to say that.
Diane Kelly: Considering she consistently gave you such poor performance reviews.
Michael Scott: That was before our relationship. She was going through a divorce. And she was drinking a lot.
Diane Kelly: Okay.
Michael Scott: Of water.