Jim: Dwight, you can't just hire someone ‘cause they're your friend.
Dwight K. Schrute: I'm not. These people are the best of the best. I find talent an attractive quality in a friend.
Nellie: They're freaks, Dwight. All your friends are weirdos and freaks.
Dwight K. Schrute: You know who else was a [British accent] freak? Spider-man. And he was also a hero.
Darryl: Your friends are like Spider-man, if he had gotten bitten by a spider and then got really into masturbating.