Michael Scott: Everyone in this room loves you. But mark my words, we are not going to support your alcoholism anymore. The next time you light yourself on fire, we are not going to help put you out.
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh. As fire marshal, I would have to.
Michael Scott: Dwight.
Dwight K. Schrute: She is a hazard to the other people of the office.
Michael Scott: Oh, okay.
Dwight K. Schrute: I suppose I could do it if it was a controlled burn in a well-ventilated area.
Jim: But you need a permit for that.
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh, right, that'll take a couple of weeks.
Creed: I can get you one in an hour.
Dwight K. Schrute: Really?