Michael Scott: Hello, little boy, what's your name?
Kevin: Michael, it's me, Kevin. Phyllis says I'm too big for her lap.
Michael Scott: Oh! I am so sorry that Phyllis hates you. And hates your body. But, Santa remembers a reindeer that was just a tiny bit different as well.
Kevin: When can I sit on your lap?
Michael Scott: Right now! Come on over here, big boy! There we go. Oh my God.
Kevin: That's really comfortable.
Michael Scott: What would you like for Christmas little boy?
Kevin: I don't know. I didn't know you were gonna ask me that.
Michael Scott: What did you think was going to happen?
Kevin: I didn't know. Nobody's ever let me sit on their lap before.
Michael Scott: All right, just say "some toys" please.
Kevin: Can you give me some choices? Cause I really don't want to mess up on this list.
Michael Scott: Damn it, Kevin. Come on.
Kevin: What about if I tell you the things I don't want?
Michael Scott: Okay get off, get off! [pushes Kevin off] Oh! Oh, God!
Kevin: I didn't even get to tell you what I wanted!
Michael Scott: Okay you know what you get? You get a thousand helium balloons attached to you so Santa doesn't have to go through this again.
Kevin: Awesome.