Michael Scott: What is wrong with these people? I would do anything for them, and they're just hanging me out to dry. Dating shouldn't be hard for somebody like me but it is, and you know why? Because nobody here is willing to help me. Nothing would ever get done in this office without a formal request, would it? Well fine, here goes.
Angela: I don't think that-
Michael Scott: Now okay, I know that this is probably not appropriate. But I need help. Because I want to play ball with my kids before I get too old. And before that happens, I need to get laid. And before that happens, I need to be in love. And I don't wanna hear, "I don't know, I can't help, na na na." No, no. I am a catch, and I am not going to be the one who got away. So this is what we're going to do. Dwight is going to hand out index cards, and I want you all to write down the name of an eligible woman for me to date by the end of the day. No, by the end of the hour, or you are fired.
Dwight K. Schrute: Write legibly, people.