The Office Quotes
- Episodes
- Season 1
- Season 2
- 201 The Dundies
- 202 Sexual Harassment
- 203 Office Olympics
- 204 The Fire
- 205 Halloween
- 206 The Fight
- 207 The Client
- 208 Performance Review
- 209 Email Surveillance
- 210 Christmas Party
- 211 Booze Cruise
- 212 The Injury
- 213 The Secret
- 214 The Carpet
- 215 Boys and Girls
- 216 Valentine's Day
- 217 Dwight's Speech
- 218 Take Your Daughter to Work Day
- 219 Michael's Birthday
- 220 Drug Testing
- 221 Conflict Resolution
- 222 Casino Night
- Season 3
- Season 4
- Season 5
- Season 6
- Season 7
- Season 8
- Season 9
The Office
A mockumentary which follows the employees of the Scranton, Pennsylvania branch of a fictional paper company, Dunder Mufflin.
Starring:
Steve Carell, Rainn Wilson, John Krasinski, Jenna Fischer, B.J. Novak, Ed Helms, Leslie David Baker, Brian Baumgartner, Kate Flannery, Angela Kinsey, Oscar Nunez, Phyllis Smith, Mindy Kaling, Paul Lieberstein, Creed Bratton, Craig Robinson, Ellie Kemper.
Recurring Actors:
Melora Hardin, David Denman, David Koechner, Andy Buckley, Rashida Jones, Amy Ryan, Kathy Bates, Zach Woods, James Spader, Catherine Tate, Clark Duke, Jake Lacy.
Original Run: 2005-2013.
Quote of the Day
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in Special Project
Dwight K. Schrute: The Shrutes have a word for when everything comes together in a man's life perfectly: Perfectinschlag. Hmm. Right now, I am in it. I finally get a chance to prove myself to corporate, I am assembling a competent team, I am likely a father, I am so deep inside of perfectinschlag right now. And just to be clear, there is a second definition, "perfect pork anus" which I don't mean.
Popular Quotes
Quote from Michael Scott in Nepotism
Michael Scott: I suppose summer had to end sometime. It's sad, though, because I had a great summer. I got West Nile virus, lost a ton of weight. Then I went back to the lake. I stepped on a piece of glass in the parking lot, which hurt. That got infected even though I peed on it. Saw Inception. Or at least I dreamt I did.
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in Dunder Mifflin Infinity
Dwight K. Schrute: I'm going to live for a very long time. My grandma Schrute lived to be 101. My grandpa Mannheim is 103, and still puttering around down in Argentina. I tried to go visit him once but my travel visa was protested by the Shoah Foundation.
Quote from Jim in Product Recall
[Jim arrives for work wearing glasses, a side-parting hair cut, and a pale yellow shirt:]
Jim: It's kind of blurry. That's better. Question, what kind of bear is best?
Dwight K. Schrute: That's a ridiculous question.
Jim: False. Black bear.
Dwight K. Schrute: Well, that's debatable. There are basically two schools of thought.
Jim: Fact, bears eat beets. Bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica.
Dwight K. Schrute: Bears do not- What is going on? What are you doing?
[aside to camera:]
Jim: Last week, I was in a drug store and I saw these glasses. Four dollars. And it only cost me $7 to recreate the rest of the ensemble and that's a grand total of $11.
[back:]
Dwight K. Schrute: You know what? Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery. So I thank you. Identity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year!
Jim: Michael!
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh, that's funny. Michael!
Quote Collections
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“Michael Scott and Holly Flax Quotes”
The best quotes from Michael and Holly's relationship.
30 quotes
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Dwight's best quotes about Schrute Farms, a 60-acre property which grows beets and hemp, and includes a bed and breakfast.
29 quotes
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Whether you've been impish or admirable, are looking forward to a Benihana or Moroccan Christmas, enjoy the best Christmas quotes from The Office as you wait for Classy Santa and Belsnickel.
42 quotes
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Every "That's What She Said" moment from The Office.
36 quotes
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“Michael Scott: The Misquotes”
"Several times a day, Michael says words that are way beyond my vocabulary." - Jim Halpert
42 quotes
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The Scranton Strangler is a local serial killer whose case the staff at Dunder Mifflin took great interest in, one H.R. rep in particular.
18 quotes
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The best quotes from Jim and Pam's relationship.
29 quotes
Trending Quotes
Michael Scott: Am I the kind of person to misremember our relationship as something more than it ever was?
Jan: Michael Scott, you are here for a post mortem.
Michael Scott: What?
Jan: You wanna dig into our relationship, go over it, see what killed it. Okay, I'm in.
Quote from Michael Scott in The Job
David: So, let me ask you a question right off the bat, what do you think are your greatest strengths as a manager?
Michael Scott: Why don't I tell you what my greatest weaknesses are? I work too hard, I care too much, and sometimes I can be too invested in my job.
David: Okay. And your strengths?
Michael Scott: Well, my weaknesses are actually strengths.
David: Oh. Yes. Very good.
Michael Scott: There you go.
Quote from Kelly in Last Day in Florida
Darryl: Hey, hey. They're back.
Kelly: Dwight, what are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be in Florida?
Jim: Yeah, the crazy thing about that is, um... Wow, you look great. Did you lose some weight?
Kelly: Thank you, for someone who actually notices this. No, I didn't lose weight. But I started using my makeup to contour my face to look skinnier. I actually put on five pounds.