Mike: Look, Marlene, I got to tell you, I'm a little confused about what's going on here.
Marlene: What's confusing? Rusty stole my heart, my virginity, and my idea. No, wait, that's wrong. It was just heart and idea.
Mike: Yeah, look, I'm trying to keep my cool here, so can you guys just walk me through how exactly you figure this is your idea?
Rusty: Well, she wanted to get something to eat, so we decided to buy a lottery ticket. And then we won. Except it turns out that to officially get the money, you need to have more than one number correct.
Mike: What does this have anything to do with anything?
Rusty: Well, Mr. Impatient. Then we went home, and she came up with the idea. Sheesh, sure know how to wreck a story, don't you?

Marlene: I'm on to you, Mike. I want my share. You tried to cut me out, but you can't. I'm gonna stick to you like pasties on a stripper's boob.
Mike: Look, I know it's not obvious from my palatial surroundings here, but we're barely turning a profit. We're not making money on this. We're putting money into it.
Marlene: You two think I'm an idiot? I seen Dateline. I know about your offshore accounts.
Rusty: How'd she find out about the offshore accounts?
Mike: We don't even have onshore accounts.
Rusty: Look, she's obviously got us. I say we move on to the human hand back scratcher. Now, turn around, and I'm gonna scratch your back with my hand and a piece of wood. You tell me which feels better. I'll hold my hand so it seems dead. It'll be like the Pepsi Challenge but with dead hands. [chuckles] Come on!

Brad: Knock, knock.
Frankie: Oh, hey, Brad. I'm not sure the kids are up for visitors right now.
Brad: Oh, this is not a social visit, Mrs. Heck. My latest AmeriCorps gig has me working at a nursing home, so my caretaking skills are on point. I brought Jell-O in dinosaur shapes. Although, when I go to the old people's home I cut them in the shape of grandchildren.
Frankie: But I alre...
Brad: Oh, tch, tch, tch! Don't worry, Mrs. Heck. Think of this like Downton Abbey and I'm one of the basement people. You won't have to do a thing.
Frankie: [v.o.] And I didn't.

Frankie: Here's your soup. Now, let me just fluff your pillow so you can sit up and eat.
Brad: Got it Mrs. Heck. Now, the secret is to fluff from the bottom up. See how I'm doing it here?
Frankie: Mm-hmm. What's that?
Brad: Oh, it's my nana's famous soup from Italy.
Frankie: Oh, I already gave them my famous soup from a can. I could make it from scratch, but they won't have it. They like the tinny taste. Reminds them of when they were little... memories, you know.
Sue: Oh. Oh, my God, this is what soup tastes like? I had no idea.

Frankie: Hey, guys. Look what I found in the basement. Who's up for a little Sand Art?
Sue: Shh! Brad's doing improv games. It's incredible. You just give him an occupation and location, and then he does it. It's better than watching TV. Watch. Okay, Brad, now you're a pizza maker.
Axl: In outer space.
Brad: Got it. [Italian accent] Oh, when will this pie come-a down? Why'd I open a pizza parlor on-a Mars-a?
This place has-a no atmosphere. [Axl and Sue laugh]
Frankie: Uh, Brad, can I see you in the kitchen for a minute?
Brad: Oh, but-a Mrs. Heck-a...
Frankie: Now.
Sue: Oh. What?
Axl: Boo. Boo.

Frankie: Here's the thing, Brad. The whole Mary Poppins thing you have going is great, but I can tell the kids are tired. I know Sue wants to sleep, and she doesn't want to hurt your feelings.
Brad: Oh. Well, I'll go ask her.
Frankie: No! Don't ask her. We don't want her to talk. See, I'm a dental expert, and they do say 48 hours on the couch. Oh, and no friends around. That's kind of a biggie. It was a test question. I remember 'cause I got it right.
Brad: Oh. All right. I guess I could go. Right after we play a quick game of Old Maid. The cards are pop star-themed, so Britney Spears is the Old Maid. Trippy, right?
Frankie: Get out.
Brad: What?
Frankie: I'm gonna give you a location... Not here. And your occupation is man leaving.
Brad: Oh, okay. [goes to grab his flask]
Frankie: I'll keep the soup.

Mike: So, I talked to your third cousin Jean, the paralegal.
Frankie: Oh, yeah? What did you find out?
Mike: It's not good, Frankie. If Marlene came up with the idea and told Rusty, it's something called implied contract. She could sue us.
Frankie: Yeah, but would she really? It's Marlene. She's crazy. She'll probably forget all about it tomorrow.
Mike: Yeah, but what if she doesn't? I sunk every penny we had into this business. Remember that jar of pennies that used to be sitting right here? You know why it's not here now? It's in the business. So, if we ever start seeing some real profits, she could come back at any time and try to claim it. In a month, a year, whenever.
Frankie: But that is so unfair. You're the one that made a working prototype. You made the sales calls. You found a distributor. You made a Twitter. This has been a second job for you. And now she can just come and take it? No, I say we fight this, Mike. We fight this the way we fought that whole healthy snack thing in preschool.

Frankie: [v.o.] The next day, Sue and Axl were feeling better, but that just gave them more energy to argue.
Sue: Give it.
Brick: Actually, I believe the person who's going to pick what to watch is me. And we are going to watch How the States Got Their Shapes. I want to find out why Tennessee is a parallelogram.

Axl: What are you talking about?
Brick: I recorded you and Sue on the way home from the dentist. You agreed to all my terms. I'm in charge now. Listen.
Axl: [on Brick's phone] Visitors, visitors, visit...
Brick: No, that's not it.
Axl: [on Brick's phone] and you just smile. You're nice. So nice.
Brick: No, I think it's after this.
Sue: No, no, no, wait, go back. What was what?
Brick: What?
Sue: That thing Axl said.
Brick: Oh, that's when he was telling you how much he loves you. You don't remember?
Sue: No.
Axl: That never happened. It didn't even sound like me.
Axl: [on Brick's phone] 'Cause you do things for people and I don't. Sometimes I need a fork, and you get it for me.
Axl: You taped me without telling... Illegal. Entrapment... turn it off.

Mike: Look, hey. I'll do all the talking about the business. You just take care of doing whatever it is that she likes you to do. Got it?
Rusty: Got it. Uh-oh, I think she lawyered up.
Mike: I'm pretty sure that's not her lawyer.
Rusty: That's her lawyer.
Marlene: Hey. I brought backup in case you decided to murder me.
Rusty: [laughs] That's ridiculous.
Marlene: This is my associate, Daphne.
Daphne: I'm named after the hot one in Scooby Doo.
Mike: Um, I didn't think it was gonna be a social thing. I thought we were gonna talk business.
Marlene: Smart thinking. If we do it here, we can write off our drinks. I saw that on The Good Wife.
Rusty: You know who was the good wife... you. Remember that divorce we had? All my fault. I guess what I'm trying to say is, you got great boobs. [Marlene kisses Rusty]
Daphne: Well, guess that just leaves us.