Frankie: [v.o.] So on Brick's confirmation day, the most important thing he confirmed was that he wanted to be with our family. God knows why.

Reverend TimTom: [plays guitar and sings] Well, that's our story about family Sometimes it'll drive you up a tree Where you'll see other families from way up high The grass looks greener on the other side Well, come down from that tree That's not safe Go pull out the weeds with your family and faith 'Cause family and faith are the best things on Earth Even if you were switched at birth Family and faith are all we got Even if the one you got don't seem so hot It's your family Have faith

Lexie: Mm, I'm really glad you decided to kiss me.
Axl: Me too. This is awesome. You're awesome. Let's not tell anyone.
Lexie: What?
Axl: I mean [chuckles] I want to tell people. Duh. Why wouldn't I? Look, it... it's just... with April, my family got all... up in my business, and if I tell them about this, they're gonna think it's too soon, my parents will get all judgy. Next thing you know, I'll spite-marry you, and we'll end up divorced. Trust me. We'll be much happier if we just keep this a secret. Plus my dad just made the final payment on my annulment, so there's that.
Lexie: No, I get it. I'm just bummed. I'm with such a cute guy, and I can't tell anyone?
Axl: Well, you can tell that guy.
Lexie: I like him. We like each other.
Man: Don't care.
Lexie: That was not satisfying.

Frankie: [v.o.] When Sue and Brad set out to cheer someone up, nobody can stop them, not even the person they're trying to cheer up.
Sue: Do I love this?
Brad & Lexie: Yes.
Sue: Am I a rainbow? Am I dolphins? Am I America? Am I my parents?!
Lexie: [buzzer] That's the pizza.
Sue: Am I pizza?
Brad: Closer.

Brad: That's it. No more sleepovers, no more tacos, and no more re-enacting the opening sequence from beloved sitcoms.
Lexie: Oh, thank God.
Sue: This is a dating ambush, and we are first responders. Ooh, that sounded kind of scary.
Brad: Trust us, the best way to get over somebody is to meet somebody new. And your date is waiting at the bar for us right now.

Frankie: [v.o.] Axl decided he wasn't too concerned about Lexie's date. After all, he was a friend of Brad and Sue's. But he thought he'd swing by just for fun.

Axl: Do I know you?
Chester: Hey. I'm one of Brad's friends.
Axl: Oh... Wow, yes. You must be a theater major, huh? Acting... that's a tough business. Hey, what did the theater major say when he got his degree? "You want fries with that?" 'Cause he couldn't get a good job.
Brad: I don't find that funny.
Chester: Actually, I'm a business major.
Axl: Oh. So am I.
Chester: Oh, yeah? I'm surprised I haven't seen you around the business library.
Axl: Well, that's not because I didn't know there was one. I've been very busy starring on the football team. I didn't get your name.
Chester: Chester Lansing.
Axl: Oh! The guy who killed two people.
Chester: No.
Axl: Yeah, I'm pretty sure that was his name. He got off 'cause they could never find the murder weapon, so he's still out there... somewhere.

Sue: Okay, look! I am trying to help my friend here, who, for some reason, finds you attractive, and you lurking around here isn't making anything any easier. So you need to go! Now! [sighs] Beat it. Tsst!
Axl: Well, you heard her. Hit the bricks.
Chester: I think she was talking to you.
Axl: It looks that way, but she's got a lazy eye. Okay, I'm gonna level with you. I like Lexie and Lexie likes me, but it's a secret. So bottom line, I'm gonna ask you to do something that I would never do, but you're better than me, so maybe you'll do it. I need you to leave.
Chester: Okay.
Axl: Seriously? Wow. You really are better than me.
Chester: You guys already have a thing going on. I don't want to mess with it. I get it. [Axl hugs Chester]
Axl: I never thought I could love anyone more than myself. You know, Lexie deserves a guy like you, or a guy just a little bit worse. [chuckles]