Morgan: [sighs] I love watching my boyfriend warm up.
Frankie: Oh. Which one is he?
Morgan: Oh, there, the cute one with the dark hair, number 23.
Frankie: Wait. Uh, that's your boyfriend? The... That one there with the hair in his eyes? Oh. Since when?
Morgan: Six weeks next Wednesday.
Frankie: Six weeks? Wow. Well, that's... That's plenty of time to, uh, you know, meet the parents and everything.
Morgan: Oh, they're dead, which is okay, 'cause he said they were really lame. I'm just messing with you, Mrs.
Heck. I know who you are.

Morgan: I actually wanted to meet you a while ago, but you know how Axl is.
Frankie: No, I-I don't. Tell me.
Morgan: Oh, you know, he's just shy in that really adorable way of his. But once you get to know him, he's so hilarious.
Frankie: Axl Heck, number 23?
Morgan: Oh, and every day he leaves a note in my locker telling me another reason he loves me. [sighs]

Frankie: [v.o.] Axl's been in love for six weeks? In retrospect, i guess there were signs.
[flashback to Axl smiling into the distance as he ate a bowl of cereal]
[flashback to Axl writing a card:]
Axl: Mom, what rhymes with "tenderly"?
[flashback to Axl watching TV with Frankie:]
Axl: Mom, I think I'm in love.
Frankie: Shh! No talking during the McDreamy scenes.

Brick: This is too scary. I-I think we should turn it off.
Sue: No. If we turn it off now, we won't get to the happy ending part.
Brick: There is no happy ending part!

Frankie: I love her.
Mike: I love her more.
Frankie: There's one thing that's kinda bugging me, though.
Mike: What's she doing with Axl?
Frankie: Right? I mean, it's weird, right? I... Look, is that bad for me to say? I mean, I adore him.
Mike: No, I know.
Frankie: It's just that she's so... Going places, and doesn't seem to want to go anywhere.
Mike: Heck curse. We're irresistible, and we have a gift for luring in women who are clearly out of our league.

Frankie: Hi, guys.
Morgan: Oh, my gosh. He was so adorable when I woke him up.
Mike: [mouth full] Yep, morning's his most adorable time of day.

Sue: What's up with Axl?
Brick: He's crying. There's only one logical explanation... He's become a pod zombie!
Sue: Don't be ridiculous.
[Axl lets Frankie kiss his forehead]
Sue: Okay. That is weird.

Frankie: Axl. I want you to know there is nothing wrong with a man showing his feelings.
Axl: You got your hug. Now get off me, okay?

Mike: So, you know, Axl, uh, about the thing you heard the other day...
Axl: You mean the tape?
Mike: We don't have to give it a name. I just, uh, thought that I should say...
Axl: You don't have to explain it....
Mike: Don't look at me. Just let me say that for whatever reason, women love it when men cry. I- It's why your mom sees every damn Sean Penn movie that comes out.
Axl: Yeah, she's pretty gay for him.
Mike: Yeah, so, you know... What you heard, uh, on that thing that your mom played for you, kinda got me your mom. So...
Axl: Yeah. I guess so.
Mike: I think I see some cheese back there.
Axl: Sweet.
Mike: Good talk.
Axl: Yep.

Mike: Axl is on fire!
Frankie: He keeps looking at Morgan.
Mike: Well, he's channeling his heartbreak into his game. I bowled a 280 the night you broke up with me.