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Season 1, Episode 9 -  Aired December 2, 2009

Frankie wonders why her kids don't spend more time together after observing the "perfect" Donahue kids. Meanwhile, Mike needs to fire Aunt Edie from her book-keeping job at the quarry.

Quote from Aunt Edie

Frankie: [v.o.] The next morning, Mike met Aunt Edie at the quarry.
Mike: It's really brutal this year, Edie. Most of the guys will get almost no bonus at all.
Frankie: [v.o.] Ever since she retired as a bookkeeper 14 years ago, Aunt Edie came to Mike's office every December to help close out the books.
Mike: Hoping we can massage the numbers to avoid triggering layoffs, but it's gonna be tight. What are you doing with that?
Aunt Edie: I gotta plug in Ginny.
Mike: You brought Ginny to the quarry?
[Aunt Ginny sits in her wheelchair outside the trailer with a blanket on her lap and cigarette in her hand]
Aunt Edie: Well, the wheelchair won't fit into the trailer, and I'm afraid to leave her home alone because I think Ginny is starting to lose it.
Mike: Oh, no kidding. Sorry to hear that.
Aunt Edie: And then there's something else. I think Ginny is starting to lose it.


Quote from Frankie

Mike: You heard your mother. Everybody, sit down.
Frankie: What is the big deal? We've eaten at the table before.
Brick: I don't have a chair.
Frankie: [v.o.] Huh. I guess we hadn't really eaten at the table since we had Brick.
Frankie: Not a problem. We have more chairs outside.

Quote from Brick

Brick: My low is realizing that my family never bought a chair for me. My high is that I can eat food right off the table. [grabs a French fry with his mouth]
Axl: Oh... Wait, I wanna change my low.

Quote from Mike

Frankie: I don't know. I wonder if we've been lazy.
Mike: How the hell have we been lazy? In the last 15 years I think we sat down twice.
Frankie: Face it, we have cut corners as parents. We're tired, we've been busy. We slacked off on a lot of family stuff and that's why our kids aren't close.
Mike: All right. If you're this worried about it, I can help you. But you know what I'm gonna say.
Frankie: Oh, God.
Mike: Sports.

Quote from Nancy Donahue

Nancy: The best part is you get to keep the wreaths at your place, so your whole house will smell amazing. And it'll last for months because you never find all the needles. [the paper sticks to Frankie's hand] That's the sap. You'll wanna have a lot of turpentine around the house. If you cut it with water, it won't make your palms so raw.

Quote from Frankie

Frankie: [v.o.] After all the crap that had been thrown that night, the sight of those three kids lovingly frolicking around the room... really bugged the hell out of me. I didn't really put my finger on why till I got home. And then it hit me. I've never seen my kids frolic together. It's like they were three strangers in a bus station waiting to get out of here. Maybe they didn't hang out together because Sue and Axl had nothing in common.
[As Sue talks, Axl mimes various ways of killing himself]
Sue: So I'm trying out for Wrestlettes which is wrestling cheerleaders, which is easier to get into than regular cheerleaders. It's all hot in the gym where wrestling is, there's not really a crowd to cheer to.
Frankie: [v.o.] Or maybe it's because Brick's so much younger. Or maybe because Brick's so much Brick.
Sue: Brick, what are you doing?
Brick: It usually copies me... but sometimes if I look very carefully... it doesn't.
Sue: Mom!

Quote from Axl

Frankie: [v.o.] When the three are forced to do anything together, that's when the fun really starts.
Sue: Feels like we've been driving forever.
Axl: Feels like we've been driving forever.
Sue: Cut it out, Axl.
Axl: Cut it out, Axl.
Sue: That's not funny.
Axl: That's not funny.
Sue: You know I hate it when you do that.
Axl: You know I hate it when you do that.

Quote from Brick

Sue: Why are you so mean?
Axl: Why are you so mean?
Brick: Why are you so mean?
Sue: I'm just ignoring you.
Axl: I'm just ignoring you.
Brick: I'm just ignoring you.
Axl: Wait, what are you doing?
Brick: Wait, what are you doing?
Axl: Brick, knock it off, that's lame.
Brick: Brick, knock it off, that's lame.
Axl: It doesn't work that way. Quit it.
Brick: It doesn't work that way. Quit it.
Axl: [groans]
Brick: [groans]

Quote from Frankie

Nancy: Oh. Those girls. I'm taking Dotty to the mall to get her ears pierced. She wants to be just like her sister.
Frankie: Wow. They're really close, aren't they? Why do you suppose that is?
Nancy: Early on, Joe and I decided our kids getting along was a priority. But it takes a lot of work.
Frankie: Damn. I was hoping it was something you just crushed into their cereal.

Quote from Frankie

Nancy: The important thing is we made sure that they spent time together. Family dinners, game nights, car trips, the obvious things.
Frankie: Oh, yeah, I'm... Those things are obvious.
Frankie: [v.o.] Dinners, game night, trips. Dinners, game night... Damn it, what was the last one?

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