Mike Quote #999
Quote from Mike in Exes and Ohhhs
Mike: It's what high schoolers do. They take risks and do dumb pranks.
Brick: Did you ever do anything like that?
Mike: Oh, you kidding me? When I was in high school, we had this algebra teacher, total jerk.He drove a Fiero with vanity license plates that said "COOLGUY." A little tip anybody who has plates that say "COOLGUY," not a cool guy. So, I had this buddy that was a mechanic, and one night when Mr. Coolguy was at some band concert, me and a bunch of guys took apart his Fiero and rebuilt it in the library.
Brick: Why would you do that to a library?
Mike: The library was fine. You're missing the point. It was just a prank. It's what kids do.
Brick: My friends and I have never done that.
Mike: Well, you guys are a bunch of nerds.
Frankie: Mike!
Mike: What? Not like it's a secret or something. He knows what he is.
Brick: Mm-hmm.
More The Middle Quotes
‘Exes and Ohhhs’ Quotes
Quote from Mike
Brick: Check out this story from the Orson Herald from 1954. "Local woman finds hat in tree."
Mike: Local man on couch wants peace and quiet.
Brick: I'm telling you, Dad, this is a bottomless fountain of information. Ooh, here's one from August 1932. "Have you seen this dog?" I wonder if they found it.
Mike: That dog is dead. Everyone who cared about that dog is dead. The new dog they bought to get over the pain of losing that dog is dead.
Brick: You're a mean, mean man.
Mike: Eh.
Quote from Ashley
Lexie: I'm sorry. I feel like I'm interrupting something.
Cassidy: No, we were just catching up.
Axl: Well, this could not get any weirder.
Ashley: Hi, Axl. A white wolf came to me in a dream and told me if I sacrificed my hair, you'd come back to me. [hands Axl a plastic baggy of human hair] You should probably make that into tea and drink it.
Axl: Oh.
Mike Heck Quotes
Quote from Not Your Brother's Drop Off
Mike: How you doing balancing the checkbook?
Sue: Well, I must have done it wrong. I have your balance at minus $11.
Mike: No, you did it right. It's us who did it wrong. [Frankie and Mike high-five]
Quote from Survey Says...
Mike: You know when I was happiest? I mean really happy? When I was driving everybody. When they were small, and I'd be driving. Didn't matter where. It was just me at the wheel and you next to me and those three idiots in the back. And I knew everything was okay, 'cause I was driving. And I had it. I had everybody.