Axl Quote #1135
Quote from Axl in Vive La Hecks
Mike: So, it's 6:00 p.m. Ready to attack the day?
Frankie: Axl, now that you're home, I need your help. We were waiting for you to get back because this is all our decision, and I need everybody to weigh in on it.
Axl: Pronto. That means, "Go on..." I think.
Frankie: Well, they're doing a huge ceremony for the reopening of the Orson cow, and they're burying a time capsule. So every family needs to choose a special item to represent them for all of eternity, and it has to fit into this box. So we really have to give it some serious thought 'cause 100 years from now, future Orsonites are gonna dig it up and judge us.
Axl: [scoffs] 100 years is nothing. I saw ruins in Rome that were 10 million years old.
Mike: No, you didn't.
Axl: Really, Dad? Who was there... me or you?
The Middle Quotes
‘Vive La Hecks’ Quotes
Quote from Sue
Frankie: Wait, your summer can begin? Honey, you're going back to school day after tomorrow.
Sue: Okay, here's the thing. You know I love summer, but I also had to work a lot 'cause we're really poor. So, I made a list of all the summery things I love to do, and I am gonna knock 'em out in the next two days. Want to hear?
Frankie: That's okay.
Sue: Hang out with friends, learn how to whistle, make my own bath salts, enjoy a good beach-read, fly a kite, binge-watch a show, get ice cream from an ice-cream truck, learn a summer sport, wear jewelry made of cereal and see if any of my friends notice, get a tan...
Frankie: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Sue, there's no way you're gonna get all that done.
Sue: [scoffs] I am getting it done. I had two cups of Axl's French coffee this morning. Not sure if I made it right. Do you know if it's supposed to be chewy?
Quote from Brick
Brick: If Cindy heard what I think she heard, a time capsule isn't the only thing you're gonna be burying in the earth.
Sue: Oh, cry me a river, Brick. Look at all this stuff I still have to do.
Brick: Have you been paying attention at all? Do you understand the enormity of my situation? If Cindy heard half the things that I said on that butt-dial, she's gonna be very angry, and trust me, you do not want to see her when she's angry. [door opens] Her eyes go black like a shark. [all gasp]
Cindy: Hello, Brick. You called me?
Brick: Oh, did I? Um, let's check my call history. Uh, let's see. I made two calls this month, one to Troy and one to... oh, yeah, you.
Cindy: I couldn't hear anything that you said. That's why I came over.
Brick: Wait. So you didn't hear me at all?
Cindy: No.
Brick: Oh, thank God. [chuckles] I'm breaking up with you. [Frankie gasps] We're in a rut. Your ears don't do it for me anymore. It's dead, it's over, it's done.
Quote from Brick
Brick: Well, I still haven't broken up with Cindy. This type of personal transaction requires a level of social grace that frankly, I do not possess.
Axl: Just have a glass of wine. I find it really takes the edge off.
Brick: You got to help me, Mom. Axl's advice was morally bereft, and Dad's was spotty at best. Oh, and just a heads-up... I think he's still dating a couple women. So, Mom, if you were still young and vital, how would you like to hear, "I'm sick of you, your ears don't do it for me anymore, we're in a rut, it's dead, it's over, it's done"?
Cindy: [on cellphone] Hello? Brick? Is that you?
Brick: Oh, my God! I butt-dialed Cindy! What on earth is my phone doing in my pocket?! I'm a dead man!
Axl: Bet you want that wine now, huh?