Brick: I actually think we can liven things up a little here. Might be time to crank the Como.
Axl: What?! No! Drugs are not cool! Stay in school!
Brick: I'm talking about Perry Como.
Axl: Perry Como, Crystal Meth... giving them first names doesn't take away the danger! What is happening to you?!
Brick: Didn't you ever listen to Aunt Edie's old records?
Axl: God, no!
Brick: Are you kidding me? Henry Mancini, Andy Williams... That's a boss bunch of cats in that collection. And Perry Como is the bossest of them all. He'd really give this party the kick it needs. [Hutch plays Perry Como's "Papa Loves Mambo"] Yeah! That's what I'm talking about. Just try and not move. You can't.
Hudson: This is not how I thought the party was gonna go, but I'm not mad at it.

Axl: All right, Brick. [music stops] I need to sleep.
Hudson: Me too. I'm really tired. So I don't need no one to read to me.
Brick: Sleep? [scoffs] Is this college or a nursing home? Come on! Let's go do something! Let's Saran Wrap someone's room. Let's do the walk of shame!
Axl: Yeah, that doesn't mean what you think it does.
Brick: Let's pull an all-nighter!
Axl: That just means staying up all night studying.
Brick: Come on! I'm up for anything! [chuckles] I'm at college, man. I want to bite into the grapefruit of life and let the juices drip down my chin, and then immediately put on hydrocortisone because I'm prone to eczema.
Axl: I'm tired! I just want to sleep. It's 2:00 a.m.!
Brick: Hey, it's 5:00 somewhere.
Hudson: Mnh-mnh... that's something else that doesn't mean what you think it does.

Axl: All right, look, I just broke up with April. And then Devin and Cassidy showed up. The universe is telling me to just hold off for now. You know, maybe I just got to hang out with my bros. And my bro. [snaps fingers]
Brick: Well, if you're not ready, you're not ready. But let me share a little story with you. There's a secondhand shop near school that I used to go to every day, and they had this zebra bookmark...
Axl: Write down "syrup pocket." I'll know what it means. Sorry. Continue.
Brick: Every time I'd go in the shop, I'd feel the bookmark. I loved it. The contrast between the black and white, the touch of the synthetic hair. And every day, I'd say, "Tomorrow, I'm gonna come back and buy it." But then I went in there one day, and it was gone.
Axl: If this is your super-not-subtle way of asking me to buy you a bookmark, it's not working.
Brick: Uh, I guess the analogy is clearer to me because I like my women like I like my bookmarks... long and skinny. You've seen Cindy. Growl!
Axl: I'm uncomfortable.