Axl: Look, it's... not like I don't want you to be my mom or that I don't want to see you. It's just... you're kind of in my face a lot. [chuckles] I mean, when you were my age, didn't you parents bug you?
Frankie: Yeah, but my parents were annoying. [sighs] Listen, this is all new territory for me, too, Axl. Y-you're my first. I'm kind of flying blind here. So help me out. Tell me what you want.
Axl: I don't know. [sighs] You can ask me less questions. And when I call home, you can maybe try not to tell me some long story about some kid I was friends with in preschool who started a website. And you can stare at me less. Sometimes, I notice you staring at me for no reason.
Frankie: If I'm staring at you, it's because I think you have the most beautiful eyes and perfect rosy cheeks that you got from your great-grandmother, and I just... [voice breaking] love you so much.
Axl: Oh, come on, Mom. You're making this weird. Look... [sighs] I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Honestly, I really didn't mean to. From now on, I'll... try to tell you about more stuff that's going on in my life and try to stay at the neighbors' less when I come home. But you got to stop worrying about me so much.
Frankie: [sighs] Axl, I'm your mom. I'm never gonna stop worrying about you. But I'll try to be cooler about it. And I'll try not to bore you with my long stories on the phone. But I am gonna stare at you, all right? I just am.
Axl: Ugh.
Frankie: Hey. It's not like I'm going in your room and sniffing your pillow.
Axl: [chuckles] Yeah.

Frankie: Axl is over at the Donahues'.
Mike: What?
Frankie: Yeah. He's over there playing Yahtzee with the whole family. I knew that was him I saw roaming around town. I can't believe he's been here for two days and he didn't come home. That lying, sneaky little jerk.
Mike: Did you tell him that?
Frankie: No, I was hiding in the bushes outside the window. Ooh! I am so mad, I can't even see straight.

Frankie: [v.o.] A hard day's work, it's the cornerstone of the American dream. Why do we do it? To keep us in our lavish lifestyles.
Frankie: Damn it. We're out of crackers. [Mike sighs] Tough day at the office?
Mike: Yeah. I got bad news from Corporate. They're making me take a paid vacation. They say it's mandatory some sort of... insurance issue.
Frankie: Oh, no. A paid vacation? Do you want to tell the kids or should I?
Mike: That's not funny. What am I gonna do? It's not like I can go anywhere.
Frankie: You don't have to go anywhere. You know, I heard that, these days, celebrities are taking what they call a staycation.
Mike: [scoffs] Yeah. I bet wherever they're staying is a hell of a lot nicer than this place. [sighs] I'm sorry. Look, I-I-I just don't like being forced to relax against my will.
Frankie: You know what? You're a weirdo. You're always talking about how Brick's a weirdo, but you're a weirdo, and that's where he gets it. No offense, Brick.
Brick: None taken. Whoop!