Mike: You know, uh... I do actually have something to say. Um, growing up as, uh, Rusty's big brother, I was always having to teach him things that I learned before him: How to tie a fishing fly, how to to slide belly-first into home plate. Anyway, the other day, when he said that he was now gonna be part of a family, I figured, well, maybe there's a thing or two I could tell him about that. 'cause see, Rusty, family... Isn't easy. Kids think they don't get to do what they want, but the truth is parents don't get to do what they want, either. Parents gotta drive kids around and help 'em with their homework after a long day at work. You think we like doing that? But that's family. A bunch of people not doing what they want. [Frankie gestures to Mike to cheer it up] I'm- I'm- I'm getting there. See... You're gonna piss each other off. You're gonna say horrible things, you're gonna make each other cry, 'cause there's no one in the world that'll make you more miserable than your family will. [Frankie gestures again] I'm getting there. See, I don't even get to give the toast I want. My point is, we're all gonna die, and we're all gonna have a gravestone with a dash on it. "1942-2016," "1963-2038" And that dash represents your life, and the thing I know for sure is, 'cause of these four people right here, my family... Is that that dash will have meant something... and, Rusty, I wish that for you, too. That's it. [to Frankie] I told you I was getting there.

Brick: I am not coming to the wedding. I will not be having the beef or the fish.
Frankie: You're coming, and it's hilarious you think there's a choice of food. It's gonna be pinwheels from the Frugal Hoosier.
Brick: But there's gonna be a bookmobile. I don't think you get this. I'll be moving with books.
Mike: Sorry, Brick, your weird Uncle's getting married, and you gotta be there. That's the last word.
Brick: Fine, then this will be my last word, because I'm never speaking to either of you ever again. Farewell. Actually, that's not a very good last word. "Farewell" has been a lot of people's last word, but it will not be mine. I'm gonna go think of a more haunting last word and then say it to you. Until then, good day... Which is not my last word.

Frankie: Wait a second. Did you plant any doubt in his mind? You better not have, 'cause I just spent all day covering the cracks in the ceiling with Wite-Out, so this wedding better be happening.
Mike: Relax. It's happening. Frankie, I told you not to go crazy with this thing. Why are you going crazy?
Frankie: Because I just... I just want our house to look nice. I mean, I look around, and it's just... scary. The way it creeps up on you, bit by bit, and year by year, everything around you just crumbling. And you see those pictures in the magazine, and their homes look so nice, and you think, "Ooh, maybe I'll put a vintage green bowl of fruit on the kitchen table, like Goldie Hawn," and you try it, and you know what? You realize your fruit is never gonna look like Goldie Hawn's fruit. I'm never gonna have Goldie Hawn's fruit, Mike! Never! And... that's just my life!
Mike: Frankie, you just need to sleep.
Frankie: You're right. I know.
Mike: No more being nuts, okay?
Frankie: Okay. Thank you.