Axl Quote #59
Quote from Axl in Valentine's Day
Axl: Hey, you guys got a minute? Excellent. On V-Day, I'm taking out this chick, Kristen. A senior. Freakishly hot.
Frankie: Wait, what happened to Kate?
Axl: God, we broke up, like, three months ago. Read my Facebook status. Anyway, here's the plan. I pick her up, I say we're just going for burgers. She's a little disappointed, then I drive past the burger place to Red Lantern. She's like, "What?" I'm like, "Yeah." We get to the table, a dozen red roses. I'm in.
Frankie: "In?" What do you mean "in"?
Axl: You know. So I figure a hundred will cover it. A hundred and twenty with gas. What do you say? Dad?
Mike: I say no.
Axl: Uh, seriously? God, I figured once you heard how awesome my plan was, you'd donate. You were young once, before you got old and lame, but whatever.
The Middle Quotes
‘Valentine's Day’ Quotes
Quote from Mike
Mike: Don't move. Where's my daughter? Sue Heck. Sue Heck. I know you're in here. [all murmuring] I told you I didn't want you to come here tonight. We are leaving immediately. And if I ever catch you sneaking out of the house again...
Sue: Huh?
Mike: Ah! And it's not gonna help for you to beg me to let you stay just one more hour. [winks at Sue]
Sue: Oh, my God, you're the worst dad ever. Can you believe this? Just as the party was getting good. Man, this stinks.
Carly: Mr. Heck? My dad didn't want me to come here either, did he?
Mike: No, he did not. You're coming with us. Get in the car.
Carly: Thank you so much, Mr. Heck.
Mike: Be cool, you're blowing our cover.
Quote from Mike
Mike: Two for dinner.
Clerk: Okay, and you're fine with a 45-minute wait?
[cut to Frankie and Mike in the car:]
Frankie: You could have at least have put our name in.
Mike: I don't wait more than ten minutes.
Frankie: I know. I know everything about you. No surprises here.
Quote from Mike
Frankie: New idea. Let's each name our five favorite moments of our marriage. But you can't use our wedding day or the birth of our kids.
Mike: I wasn't going to. [chuckles]