TV Quotes

Mike: Anyway, Frankie is putting together a nice dinner. You should come.
Big Mike: I don't wanna be a bother.
Mike: You're not a bother, Dad.
Big Mike: Don't go making turkey on my account.
Mike: We're making it, anyway. All of America is.
Big Mike: Well, if I come, you'll just have to get another chair out of the garage. All that hassle.
Mike: Okay, Dad. We're eating at 4. Come if you want, don't if you don't.
Big Mike: That's not much of an invite, is it?

Frankie: [v.o.] So Mike finally went to ask his dad to Thanksgiving. Which sounds easier than it is, because Big Mike's kind of a hoarder who doesn't like to leave his house. Maybe because he's got too much pride to accept an invitation. Or maybe because there's too much crap blocking the door.
Mike: [knocks] I know you're home, Dad. Montgomery Ward went out of business 10 years ago.
Big Mike: That's good to know. [replaces the "Gone to Montgomery Ward. Back in 5." Post-It on his door with one reading "Gone to Circuit City. Back in 5 min."]
Mike: So Thanksgiving is coming up.
Big Mike: Is it, now? Oh, well, the calendar says it's today.
Mike: Yeah. Well, the calendar is 4 years old, Dad.

Frankie: Did you cover for me?
Bob: Told him you had a pregnancy scare. And also that you burst an aneurysm. You should know that I do not think he bought it.

Lisa: So you really read all of Dickens?
Brick: Yep. I started last summer and finished by the spring.
Bob: When I was his age, I was quite the reader myself. No Dickens, though. I was homeschooled. My reading list was all about how to avoid the devil.