Frankie Quote #1776
Frankie: So, you see, Blake, it was kind of the hospital's screw-up because they gave me the room that your mom was supposed to get. [chuckling] That's why they thought there were two baby Fergusons.
Blake: Hmm. My mom says you took her room 'cause it was nicer.
Frankie: Well, yes, technically, but we didn't ask for the room, so what we did was wrong, but it wasn't bad. See, there are different levels of wrong. This is what we call "light wrong." If I had stayed your mom, I would have explained this to you.
Quote from Brick
Blake: Thanks a lot. I've missed Swimming with the Savior and Canoeing with Christ 'cause you won't admit you started it.
Brick: Oh, I'll admit I started it when I start it, which I did not do. Now, if you don't mind, I'm getting confirmed next week, and I need to brush up on 2,000 years' worth of Bible facts.
Blake: [sighs] Hey, that's my Bible!
Brick: Uh, no, it is not. I wrote "BH" right here.
Blake: It doesn't say "BH." It says "BF."
Brick: No, it says "BH"... Brick Heck.
Blake: No, it says "BF"... Blake Ferguson.
Brick: Oh, my God. Blake Ferguson? The Blake Ferguson?! [hugs Blake] We're practically brothers!
Blake: Hey! What are you talking about?
Brick: Uh, it's me... Brick. Brick Heck! We were switched at birth! I spent the first month of my life with your family, and you spent the first month of your life with my family. Why aren't you more excited about this? You're acting like you've never heard this story before. You've never heard this story before.
Quote from Brick
Blake: You're lying. It is very un-cool to lie and triply un-cool to do it at Wilderness Jesus Jam!
Brick: I'm not lying. Your name is Blake Ferguson. You live in Orson Heights. Your parents are Charlie and Anna Ferguson. You were born October 15, 2001, at Orson County Hospital, but my mom stole your mom's room and my dad got distracted by a sports game on TV and they accidentally took you home!
Blake: That did not happen! My parents would never let that happen!
Reverend TimTom: Whoa, whoa, whoa! I don't know what the problem is here, but whatever it is, I'm sure the Rovin' Rev can help.
Brick: Ha. We were switched at birth. Uh, it was a month before anyone figured it out. I assumed he knew all this, but apparently, his parents never told him, and he does not seem to be taking it well.
Reverend TimTom: [chord plays] [sighs] I don't have a song for that.
Quote from The Christmas Tree
Brick: Hey, Mom. Can I interest you in a decorative crock-pot cozy? Now you can leave your crock-pot out where everyone can see and save yourself unwanted embarrassment. It's for the women's club. These glasses are the prize for being their top seller.
Frankie: Let me guess. You're using the cozy money to pay off the peppermint-bark people.
Frankie: Brick, you're running a Ponzi scheme.
Brick: A Ponzi-what, now?
Frankie: You're using money you don't have to pay off the debt you had before, and now you got to go into even more debt to pay off this debt. It's an endless cycle. You're never gonna catch up.
Brick: Isn't that what you guys do with your credit cards?
Frankie: Well, yeah, but we're gonna die before they catch us.
Quote from The Shirt
Frankie: All I asked was for you to clean the bathroom! How hard is that?
Brick: Well, if you want to do it properly, you have to get to the root of the problem.
Frankie: Whoa, whoa, whoa, Brick. We are not "root of the problem" people. The surface is where we live. You start chipping away and digging down to the root of everything, the whole place falls apart. The filth and grime is what's holding everything together. You want to see a video of how we fix things? We wipe, we slide, we shove, we close. If a drawer is too full to open, move on to the next one. Never open it again.