Mike Quote #890
Quote from Mike in Survey Says...
Mike: It's just such a big part of who he is, you know? I mean, when he was a kid, he was so fast. He m... He moved so fast, like a... fast thing, and I thought, "This kid might actually be able to do this."
Frankie: What? Professionally?
Mike: Mm.
Frankie: Like in the NF football league?
Mike: For a couple of years. Then, obviously, he would open a steakhouse.
Frankie: Pbht!
Mike: You were right.
Frankie: No, duh. I always am.
Mike: Not just that it was a big part of him. It was a big part of me. I was a guy whose kid played football, and now I'm not. It's not fair. They just decide they can quit football, go to Dollywood. They think they can do what they want.
Frankie: Well, they can.
The Middle Quotes
‘Survey Says...’ Quotes
Quote from Mike
Mike: You know when I was happiest? I mean really happy? When I was driving everybody. When they were small, and I'd be driving. Didn't matter where. It was just me at the wheel and you next to me and those three idiots in the back. And I knew everything was okay, 'cause I was driving. And I had it. I had everybody.
Quote from Brick
Brick: How many stars should I give this graph paper? A nine is extremely satisfied, but an eight is very satisfied. That's a pretty wide gap. They really should have half grades. Dad, what's it like to be extremely satisfied?
Mike: You're asking the wrong guy, Brick.
Brick: Okay, well, have you ever been very satisfied?
Mike: I'd be somewhat satisfied if you let me watch my show.
Brick: I just don't want to mess up here. The world is relying on my answers for their graphpaper-buying needs. "How does this graph paper compare with others?" That's like asking you to choose your favorite child.
Mike: That's not as hard as you'd think.
Brick: I need a second opinion here. I'm losing my mind. How does that feel?
Mike: Like paper.
Brick: How would you describe the weight of it?
Mike: Like paper.
Quote from Brick
Brick: I'm gonna give it a seven for comparability.
Mike: Okay.
Brick: You're comfortable with seven?
Mike: Yeah.
Brick: I'm gonna click it.
Mike: Please do.
Brick: Once I hit this button, that seven's written in stone.
Mike: Good.
Brick: You're being awfully cavalier.
Mike: Brick. [Brick clicks] Damn it.
Brick: I knew it. It's a six. Any idiot could see it's a six.