Frankie Quote #1379
Quote from Frankie in Steaming Pile of Guilt
Frankie: I can't believe we forgot Brick's birthday. We do this all the time, and now we did it on his 13th birthday. And now it's over, and it's just what we do, and it's sad.
Mike: Hey, if he really cared, he'd have spoken up. He doesn't care that much. So just forgive yourself.
Frankie: [scoffs] Forgive myself? What do you mean, "forgive myself"? It should be "forgive ourselves." You forgot his birthday, too, you know.
Mike: Eh. Remembering birthdays is more of a mom thing.
Frankie: Really? Tell me what isn't a mom thing. I take care of them when they're sick, I drive them everywhere. I ask the parents with good cameras to take pictures of them at school events. Why am I the one who always has to be the monkey arms?
Mike: "Monkey arms"?
Frankie: Yeah, you know, monkey arms... from Animal Planet. The mom chimpanzee makes this bridge with her arms so all the little baby monkeys can get from one tree to the next. Yeah, and what is the dad doing? Just sitting there, scratching his butt.
Mike: [chuckles] Well, I'm sure you'll think of something.
Frankie: No, no, no, no. You're in this, too, pal. You've got longer limbs than anybody. Put your monkey arms where your mouth is and think.
The Middle Quotes
‘Steaming Pile of Guilt’ Quotes
Quote from Brick
Brick: Question number 18... "What is my favorite part of the movie?"
Sue: The credits! I said "the credits."
Brick: Incorrect.
Axl: The FBI warning!
Brick: That's correct... the FBI warning. What's my favorite smell?
Mike: I skipped that one.
Brick: And the correct answer is...
Axl & Brick: New-book smell.
Axl: Boom!
Brick: I also would have accepted "old book smell."
Quote from Frankie
Frankie: [microwave beeps] Okay, we need something green to go with dinner. Ooh! We can make ice-pack peas. They haven't been in there that long. When was the O.J. chase? You know, we really should buy some fresh vegetables sometimes, just so w... [gasps] Oh, my God. We forgot Brick's birthday.
Mike: What?
Frankie: Brick's birthday... in November! What month are we in now?
Mike: February. [Frankie sighs] Yeah, that's bad. You know, it's been so long, at this point, maybe we should just float it to next year.
Frankie: That's what we did last year. Ugh! We're treating him like a leap-year baby. [gasps] Sue's birthday... that's coming up, too! Oh, seriously, why do we have two birthdays so close together?
Mike: We didn't.
Quote from Brick
Brick: For years, you've ignored me. You've wandered away when I'm talking. Often when I'm sharing something I feel is important, your eyes glaze over or Axl goes "blah, blah, blah." So now you're finally going to listen to what I have to say.
Mike: We got to get a calendar system.
Brick: I spent a lot of time thinking on how I should kick things off, and I believe I've landed on something that's a real crowd-pleaser. Railroad gauges. You've probably always wondered how we ended up with the 4-feet, 8.5-inch gauge. Well, it all begins with the chariots of imperial Rome...
[later, "Fun with Vowels":]
Brick: You see, I was always curious if there were any words that contained the five vowels "a," "e," "i," "o," and "u" in just that order. Turns out, there are a handful.
[later, "My favorite manuals and catalogues":]
Brick: Item c493l... portable sewing kit...