Axl Quote #447

Quote from Axl in Life Skills

Ms. Schaefer: Sue, where's Axl?
Axl: [enters] Ladies and gentlemen, The Ax is back. [throws Sue an apron] Hey! [grabs a resume from a girl at the door] Oh, Sue. Dropped her resume. Silly. That would have been a mess. All right, Sue.
Ms. Schaefer: Okay. And do you have your report?
[Alan Huang hands the report to Axl through the window]
Axl: Of course.
Ms. Schaefer: And it's ten pages?
Axl: Actually 11. Hope that's okay. [a poster board is slid under the door] Hello. This is Sue, my name is Axl, and we will be your chefs today. [Axl removes the cover from the cart]
Students: Ooh!
[After Axl claps, the band come in and play classical music]
Axl: Imagine yourselves in an Italian restaurant. How do you think something like this comes together?
Sue: I don't know!
Axl: Thank you, Sue, for expressing what we're all thinking.

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 ‘Life Skills’ Quotes

Quote from Frankie

Frankie: [sighs] Look, we know an act of God when we see one, okay? We've had rain from our ceiling. We've had floods from our dishwasher. We've had bedbugs, tornadoes, black mold, red ants, a frog infestation! Yeah. Frogs. It's the end of days at our house. I am not kidding you! Look, in other people's cases, God works in mysterious ways, but not in ours. With us, he's pretty straightforward. And we are not people who ask for a lot. But we are people who demand what is ours and what is right, and if you cannot get with that, then maybe you need to get your supervisor, because I don't think that you want good, paying customers like us driving away angry.
[cut to a well wrapped-up Mike and Frankie driving home as the wind blows:]
Frankie: I'm so angry.

Quote from Sue

Sue: You know, I went on kickinitteenstyle.com and took the "Rate Your Assignment Partner" quiz, and you are a "severe collaboration limitation."
Axl: With no due respect, I disagree.
Sue: I thought you might say something like that, so I also ranked you on the sibling scale, and guess what? You're a "bummer brother." So... yeah.
Axl: Whatever. This whole thing is lame. Except kitchen floor hoops, which I just invented, and is totally awesome.
Sue: I know you fancy yourself some kind of rebel, Axl, but sometimes in life, you just have to follow the rules. I put on sunscreen an hour before going outside. I wait till the bus comes to a complete stop before standing. You don't think I would love to fill up on bread? I would. But that's not how the world works. The rule of this project is that you and I take the allotted two weeks and do it together. And that's just what we're gonna do, mister. 'Cause a "D" might fly in Ax Land, but it doesn't work in Sue City. And not the one in Iowa. The one right here.

Quote from Brick

Dr. Fulton: One surefire way of making friends? Finding something the other kids are into and gettin' on board with that program.
[cut to Brick on the playground surrounded by kids who aren't moving:]
Dr. Fulton: Hey, Brick. Uh... I thought today's assignment was playing tag.
Brick: I am. I've achieved the highest level of tag. I'm it.