Brick Quote #175

Quote from Brick in Valentine's Day II

Mike: Hey, buddy. Can we talk to you for a sec?
Frankie: Listen, Brick, we know you didn't want Autumn to find out that you liked her yet, but this could be a good thing.
Brick: I had this whole plan. First she learns she has a secret admirer. Then I share with her the book that changed my life, Diary of a Wimpy Kid. Then, sometime in late May, I sit down with her in front of the computer and show her my favorite logos. This, of course, leads to a discussion of fonts, and then she's mine.
Mike: This is the plan I foiled?

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 ‘Valentine's Day II’ Quotes

Quote from Mike

Mike: Hey, hey, hey, hey! Hey! All right! That's it! That's it! We're shutting it down! Party's over! Here we go. You guys shouldn't be celebrating Valentine's Day anyway, because it's a scam cooked up by the greeting card companies. You know what you should be doing? You should be studying. 'Cause guess what they're doing in China right now? They are doing math and they're learning how to be C.E.O.S of greeting card companies so they can sell us Americans a heart-shaped load of crap!
[cut to Mike returning home:]
Mike: Banned.

Quote from Mike

Frankie: [v.o.] Certain things you can count on for Valentine's Day: flowers, candy, Mike ranting about flowers and candy...
Mike: I'm just saying it's not a real holiday. It's a scam cooked up by the greeting card companies, and everybody buys into it. Some college kid in an office building somewhere is gonna write a card telling me how I feel? I don't think so.
Frankie: You don't have to get me a card.
Mike: I'll get you your card. And what about the flowers? I got to bring flowers just 'cause it's February 14th? What if I want to bring you flowers on some other day of the year?
Frankie: You don't need to bring me flowers.
Mike: Yeah, I'm gonna be the one idiot in America who doesn't bring his wife flowers on Valentine's Day. Don't worry. You'll get your flowers.
Frankie: And while you're there, we need vacuum bags and a new plunger.

 Brick Heck Quotes

Quote from Hecks on a Train

Brick: Do we have any details about the cause of Aunt Edie's death?
Mike: Just one. She was 96.
Brick: Interesting. Has anyone questioned Helen Riley? She was the perennial runner-up to Aunt Edie in the church pie contest.

Quote from Mommapalooza

Sue: Okay, so, what do we do? Dad didn't give us enough drywall to fix a hole this big. He's gonna freak out.
Brick: I'm not gonna lie. It's gonna be really rough for you.
Sue: Me? You're the one who did this.
Brick: Well, you're the older sister who left her little brother to do major home repair on his own. Besides, if Dad flips out, I can just play the quirk card. I shrug, I look confused, throw in a few whoops and whispers, lick something if I have to... I'm off scot-free.
Sue: Oh, my God. You're diabolical.
Brick: I am not diabolical. [whispers] Diabolical. [normal voice] It's so easy. [whispers] It's so easy. [normal voice] Okay, that one wasn't planned.