Big Mike Quote #1

Quote from Big Mike in Thanksgiving

Frankie: [v.o.] So Mike finally went to ask his dad to Thanksgiving. Which sounds easier than it is, because Big Mike's kind of a hoarder who doesn't like to leave his house. Maybe because he's got too much pride to accept an invitation. Or maybe because there's too much crap blocking the door.
Mike: [knocks] I know you're home, Dad. Montgomery Ward went out of business 10 years ago.
Big Mike: That's good to know. [replaces the "Gone to Montgomery Ward. Back in 5." Post-It on his door with one reading "Gone to Circuit City. Back in 5 min."]
Mike: So Thanksgiving is coming up.
Big Mike: Is it, now? Oh, well, the calendar says it's today.
Mike: Yeah. Well, the calendar is 4 years old, Dad.

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Features in the collection: Thanksgiving Quotes.

‘Thanksgiving Quotes’

Quote from Brick in Thanksgiving IV

Brick: This book is life-changing. Mom dropped me at the library to find the perfect holiday read, and out of nowhere, it just appeared to me. "The real true behind-the-scenes story of the making of Erich Segal's 1970's classic, Love Story."
Mike: Really? All the books they got in the library, and that's the one you picked?
Brick: Have you read it? It's fascinating. How did I go so long without finding this? It's a Thanksgiving gift, I tell you. A gift.
Mike: You know, the only thing that would have made that better is if strangers were here to see it.

Quote from Big Mike in Thanksgiving II

Mike: When was I supposed to know this? I only found out 'cause I went by the house to invite you to Thanksgiving.
Big Mike: Oh, no. You don't want an old man with a broken hip at your Thanksgiving.
Mike: That's true, but my wife does. Please, Dad. Please, please, please come to Thanksgiving.
Big Mike: Oh, I don't want to be a bother.
Mike: It's not a choice, Dad. The nurses say you gotta be discharged tomorrow, and they can't let you go home alone. Don't worry. We got TV and crummy food at our house, too.
Big Mike: You don't exactly roll out the red carpet, do you?

 ‘Thanksgiving’ Quotes

Quote from Big Mike

Mike: Anyway, Frankie is putting together a nice dinner. You should come.
Big Mike: I don't wanna be a bother.
Mike: You're not a bother, Dad.
Big Mike: Don't go making turkey on my account.
Mike: We're making it, anyway. All of America is.
Big Mike: Well, if I come, you'll just have to get another chair out of the garage. All that hassle.
Mike: Okay, Dad. We're eating at 4. Come if you want, don't if you don't.
Big Mike: That's not much of an invite, is it?

Quote from Mr. Ehlert

Mr. Ehlert: All right, team, bring it in. Take a knee. Sales are at an all-time low. That is why I'm switching to a 365-day schedule. Like that diner out on Route 7. They do very well.
Frankie: Wait, wait, wait. Are you saying that we're working on Thanksgiving? [scoffs] Mr. Ehlert, that is just wrong.
Mr. Ehlert: Well, so is taking the country away from a bunch of Indians, but aren't you glad we did?

 Big Mike Quotes

Quote from Hoosier Maid

Rusty: Dad's all better now.
Big Mike: Yeah.
Rusty: He pooped! [laughs]
Mike: You what?
Big Mike: Yeah, the darndest thing is something was gumming up the works. So don't go eyeballing my microwaves. I've still got a few miles left on me.
Mike: So, you're perfectly fine? You went to the john, and now you have no trouble walking at all?
Big Mike: Feel better than ever. [dances] [chuckles] Just like I told you, son. You don't have to worry about me. When the time comes, I'll just walk out into the woods, lie down, and die.

Quote from Thanksgiving II

Mike: When was I supposed to know this? I only found out 'cause I went by the house to invite you to Thanksgiving.
Big Mike: Oh, no. You don't want an old man with a broken hip at your Thanksgiving.
Mike: That's true, but my wife does. Please, Dad. Please, please, please come to Thanksgiving.
Big Mike: Oh, I don't want to be a bother.
Mike: It's not a choice, Dad. The nurses say you gotta be discharged tomorrow, and they can't let you go home alone. Don't worry. We got TV and crummy food at our house, too.
Big Mike: You don't exactly roll out the red carpet, do you?