Sue: I'll tell you what's going on here, Dan. We are students enjoying student activities at our university which our parents pay for!
All: Yeah!
Sue: We have rights. We may be temporarily housed in temporary housing, but we are not temporary people! So I suggest you climb onboard to the new Bin rules, Dan! Or the only thing not allowed in the Bin is you!
Dan: Whatever. I'm doing a semester abroad next year, anyway.
Sue: Oh, thank you so much, Brad. This weekend has just been the best ever, and you are amazing. Oh, I can't believe you have to leave. You never should have come here because now I know how much I miss you.
Brad: You know, I only have one class tomorrow. I guess maybe I could stay one more day?

Mrs. Roberts: So, who can tell me what FDR said in response to the problems of The Great Depression?
Brick: [raises hand] [sings jingle] You're gonna love our pizza [laughter]
Mrs. Roberts: Think you're pretty funny, do you, Heck?
Brick: [sings jingle] You're gonna love our pizza [talks] No, I didn't get to finish.
Mrs. Roberts: You know what else you're gonna love? You're gonna love our principal's office.

Mike: You didn't say you were picking up a pizza.
Frankie: To be honest, I don't even know why I got it.
Mike: [sighs] He still hasn't responded to the dirty carrot, huh?
Frankie: No, and it's comedy gold. I mean, if carrot genitalia won't fix this, Mike, I don't know what will.
Mike: Felt like a winner to me.
Frankie: [sighs] God, Mike. My son's not talking to me. I mean, really not talking to me. I can't pretend like this is some little thing anymore. You know, you hear about these families that are estranged, and you can't imagine that happening to you, but it is. I mean, is this it? Do I not have a son anymore?
Mike: [sighs]

Mike: So, listen. I know things got pretty crazy before Thanksgiving, but it's water under the bridge, right? You know your mom. She is how she is. Sometimes she says things in the heat of the moment, but anyway, she's pretty upset about the whole thing and... I don't know if you got it or not, but she sent you a picture of a carrot.
Axl: Yeah, I got it. It's hilarious.
Mike: Great. If you could take a minute, shoot her back a text about the carrot, it'd be...
Axl: Nope.
Mike: What do you mean no?
Axl: I mean I'm not talking to her. She went too far this time. You can say anything you want about me, but you start taking shots at my lady, we got a problem. You know what I'm saying? No one talks crap about my lady!
Mike: I hear you, but your mom is my lady, and I need you to cut her some slack. She's sorry about what she said, and she extended the dirty carrot as a peace offering. The least you can do is accept it.
Axl: Why should I?
Mike: Because to not make an inappropriate comment about the dirty carrot will be disrespectful to your mother.

Axl: Oh, if you're gonna give lessons on disrespect, maybe you should talk to your wife first. She insulted the girl that I love, the girl that changed my life!
Mike: Okay, take it down a notch.
Axl: No, you take it down a notch! There are two Axls now... one before April and one after April.
Mike: Is there a third one I can talk to?
Axl: You just don't get it. Just 'cause you and Mom are dead behind the eyes doesn't mean I am. The other night, April and I talked until the sun rose.
Mike: No, I get it. Your girlfriend's great. But you know what? So is your mom. So text her about the carrot. I'm not asking you, I'm telling you.
Axl: Yeah, and I'm not 5 anymore. I'm not gonna do it just 'cause you tell me to.

Dr. Fulton: You know, Brick, all stress has certain trigger points. For me, it was finding out that Shelly was having a baby with her butt-faced, ponytail husband. But the good news is, we... we all find ways to cope and move on. For example, I'm... I'm seeing this great new gal. Her name is Barbara, but I call her Shelly. She's 68 years old, but she's very youthful. Anywho, I think you need to find a way to relieve some stress, you know, blow off some steam, you know, have some fun.
Brick: Hmm.
Dr. Fulton: That's why I always say yes to mall-walking with Barbara-Shelly. She sets quite a brisk pace. You know, she's younger than Mick Jagger.
Brick: Who?