Mike: Hey, buddy. You okay?
Brick: Can someone bring me a book?
Frankie: Brick, you said something about a permission slip?
Brick: If people are allergic to bees, can bees be allergic to people? Whoop!

Frankie: [v.o.] Halloween. The most terrifying time of the year, where frightening horrors lurk around every corner.
Sue: I got my learners permit! [clip of woman screaming]
Axl: I'm 18! I get to pick the president! [clip of woman screaming]
Brick: I signed you up to work at the Halloween fair. [clip of Frankie screaming]
Frankie: Brick, why would you volunteer me at school? You know the line... "Sorry, my mom works long hours.
We hardly ever see her." I made you memorize it.
Brick: Well, I thought it was okay since you're not working now.
Frankie: You didn't tell people that, did you? [sighs] If they know I'm not working, I'm gonna get calls for everything. Mike, do not answer the phone.
Mike: Never do.

Sue: Maintaining safe speed. [gasps] Uh-oh. Obstruction in the road. Checking mirrors. Applying brake. Beep! Checking mirrors. Re-entering traffic.
Mike: Enough practicing, Sue! You're gonna have to learn to drive a real car. I'm not driving you around forever listening to One Direction. I'm starting to like a couple of those songs.
Sue: You guys, after my near-death experience accidentally driving the Donahues' car, I am not getting behind the wheel again until I feel completely prepared for any situation.
Axl: Hey, Sue. Just a heads up, traffic in the family room is horrible.
Sue: Good tip. I'll take the hallway.

Nancy: Hi, Frankie! I see a happy Halloween in your future!
Frankie: Oh, Nancy, you look great!
Nancy: Oh, thanks. I saw it in a catalog, sewed it myself, and saved 14 bucks. And you look...
Frankie: Well, I already got halfway dressed, and I couldn't find the rest of my costume, so, yep, I'm raggedy mouse.

Sue: Mom, Dad, I have done a lot of driving practice, and I think I am finally ready to take the next step.
Mike: Finally. About time you get out there and...
Sue: Picking a keychain! Which one do you guys like? I've been collecting them over the years, and now that I'm gonna drive, it's finally time to choose. This one's "One Direction." "I 'heart' New York." I've got, like, four "Brown County" ones. [gasps] This one says "I'm going commando." I don't really get it, but I do support the military.
Mike: Why don't you take the one shaped like a key and put it in the ignition?
Sue: I just want to be prepared. I'm not ready. I can't even narrow my keychains down to a top three.
Frankie: Sue, you are ready. Remember when you didn't want to take your training wheels off your bike, and we made you? What happened then?
Sue: [gasps] Oh, my God. This situation is very similar to that situation. I can do this. [gasps] I am gonna go drive a car. [squeals] I'll be waiting outside.

Brick: Hey, Mom. Whoop.
Frankie: Hey, Brick. You're back already, huh? How was it?
Brick: Awesome. Mrs. Donahue brought thermoses of apple cider, and then she took us to Orson Heights. Everyone was giving out full-sized candy bars, and the houses are huge. Have you ever considered moving there?
Frankie: Come on. Unload the loot. Mama's jonesing for a Kit Kat. Whoa. Brick, that is a buttload of candy.
Brick: I know. By my calculations, I should have enough to eat a piece every day for the next year and a half.
Frankie: [mouth full] Oh no, Brick. You are not eating all this candy. Okay, tell you what... we'll make a deal. You can eat as much as you want for the next 24 hours, and then we're sending the rest to the soldiers overseas. Hmm?
Brick: Fine.
Frankie: All right? Come on. Time for bed. [slides a Kit Kat towards her]

Axl: Person on crutches coming through.
Frankie: Oh, does it hurt?
Axl: Let's see. I had a car on my foot. Yeah. It hurts.

Sue: Hey, Axl. Bologna, huh? That's a great choice. Hey, you know, I can carry that stuff. It'd be no problem.
Axl: Haven't you done enough already? First, you knock me out of football, now you gotta brag about how you're able to carry stuff?
Sue: No. I mean, I can carry it for you.
Axl: Oh.
Sue: Look, Axl, I know how much football means to you, and I would never do anything to ruin that, or your chance of getting a college scholarship. I am so very sorry, very, very, very sorry for spraining your foot. I mean, if I could go back a-and run over my own foot with the car, I would, but I don't think it's physically possible to do that from the driver's seat.
Axl: Well, if anyone could do it, you could.

Frankie: [to Nancy] We're not exactly moving a lot of fish here. What happens to all the leftovers?
[cut to:]
Mike: I know times are tough, but I'm not eating goldfish for dinner.
Frankie: Well, apparently, fish mom gets to bring home the fish.
Mike: Mm. Fish mom should take 'em down the hall to porcelain pond.

Sue: I thought Mom was coming with me.
Mike: Well, we rock-paper-scissored for it.
Sue: And you won?
Mike: Sure. Let's go with that.