Mike: What do you think about this for Bill? It's a bottle opener that plays the I.U. fight song.
Frankie: Oh, did Bill go to I.U.?
Mike: I don't know. Damn it! Now I got to find out where Bill went to college? He's got me right where he wants me... thinking about him.
Frankie: Wait. I didn't think you were gonna get him a present.
Mike: Oh, I'm getting him a present. I want this debt paid. I'm settling the score, once and for all.
Frankie: [scoffs] Okay, you're buying him a Christmas gift, not avenging the death of your father. [Axl chuckles]
Mike: Okay. What about this? A popcorn tin with cheese-, butter and caramel-flavored popcorn?
Frankie: Uh, I don't know. It doesn't seem very personal.
Mike: I don't want it to be personal. Bill's already got everything. It's so hard to buy for a man. There's a million things you can buy for a woman.
Frankie: Which makes your choice of inflatable foot bath that much more baffling.
Mike: [sighs] Don't ever get married.