Quote from Mike in The Big Chill
Axl: Yeah, well, there's some computer chip that keeps track of its mood, how much it cries over the next week, how well I take care of it. It's supposed to teach me responsibility. Okay. I'm gonna go shoot some hoops with the guys. Later. Whoo.
Mike: Whoa. No, you're not allowed to have a baby and then go shoot hoops. I tried.