‘Average Rules’
Season 1, Episode 24 - Aired May 19, 2010
Frankie and Mike are stunned when they learn Brick may be held back in the second grade because of the school librarian, Mrs. Nethercott (Betty White). Meanwhile, Axl's aptitude test results show he is academically gifted, and Frankie tries to help Sue be recognized in school when she isn't featured in the year book.
Quote from Frankie
Frankie: [v.o.] And that night we celebrated it all. Sue making the no-cut team, Brick moving up to third grade, Axl's B minus.
Axl: So, what I did was, I slept through Science and English, so I was completely refreshed...
Sue: So I got a practice schedule and a parent phone tree. Can you believe it? Yeah, a phone tree.
Frankie: Wow.
Frankie: [v.o.] I know it may not seem like much to celebrate. The truth is maybe we are just average. But the way I see it, families where parents get up every morning and go to jobs that are hard so they can get their kids through school and life, and struggle to make it all work, and manage to do it with dignity and a little humor, well, that's not average... that's extraordinary.
Quote from Mike
Frankie: It is just heartbreaking. She's so used to failure she doesn't even feel bad about it anymore. And you know whose fault that is?
Mike: The yearbook committee?
Frankie: No, Mike, ours.
Mike: Wasn't even my second choice.
Quote from Mike
Mrs. Thomas: Brick may not be moving on to third grade.
Frankie: What?
Mike: What do you mean not moving on? He's the smartest kid in the class. I mean, I'm sure you're doing your best, but not a real brain trust here.
Frankie: Mike.
Mrs. Thomas: It's because he hasn't been returning library books.
Mike: Are you kidding me? He's not moving up to third grade over library books? That's nuts.
Mrs. Thomas: The librarian is invoking Statute 482b. He's gonna have to resolve it with her. And please make sure that he does. It's been a long year.
Quote from Frankie
Guidance Counselor: We just got the results of Axl's aptitude test.
Mike: You don't gotta sugarcoat it. We already had two other conferences today so we're getting pretty used to the drill.
Guidance Counselor: He tested as academically gifted.
Frankie: Axl is gifted? Our Axl?
Mike: Are you calling my son a cheater?
Guidance Counselor: Oh, no. Look. He's gifted. He's brilliant.
Frankie: Oh.
Guidance Counselor: The problem is he's performing far below his potential. He's getting C's.
Frankie: Which are the new D's.
Guidance Counselor: It's odd. We rarely see this kind of gap between achievement and aptitude, except in families where at least one of the parents is in prison.
Quote from Sue
Frankie: Guess what. I happened to run into your principal today and he told me they've decided to change the policy and make cross-country a no-cut sport.
Sue: No-cut?
Frankie: No cuts. No tryouts. All you have to do is show up on Tuesday, go around the track a few times and you're in.
Sue: Oh, my God. Oh, my God. [chuckles] I love cross-country. That's running, right?
Frankie: Yep, running. All you gotta do is run.
Sue: I can run. I ran all the way home from school yesterday. And I got here so fast. Imagine how fast I can go when I'm not holding a heavy yearbook. [gasps] Imagine how fast I can go when I have complete use of my arms? [knocks over foods]
Frankie: I know.
Sue: Oh, my God. This is it. I'm finally gonna be part of a team.
Frankie: I know, honey. We did it. You did it. [both scream then laugh]
Quote from Mike
Frankie: [v.o.] I was feeling pretty darn good. The Heck family was on the right track. Sue was practicing for cross-country. Brick was slowly but surely finding his lost library books. [Brick removes a book from the refrigerator] And Axl was studying in his room.
Frankie: Have you checked on Axl in a while, Mike?
Mike: Yeah, yeah, he's doing great. [electric guitar playing] I'll go check on him.
Quote from Brick
Brick: Have you guys seen a book this big?
Frankie: How would you even get a book that big home?
Brick: I don't know. Did I even bring it home? I have no idea. Now, are you gonna help me or am I gonna repeat second grade?
Quote from Axl
Frankie: [v.o.] And guess what. Our lucky streak didn't end there. The next day Axl came home with his World History test and the best grade of his life.
Axl: B minus. I got a B minus, people. [laughs]
Quote from Brick
Frankie: [v.o.] And Brick found a way to make it to third grade by checking out the same atlas from the municipal library and returning it to the school library.
Brick: See you in the fall, Mrs. Nethercott. I hear third graders get to come to the library even more often.