Michael: Oh, hey, Eleanor, thanks for coming in. Sorry about the mess. [clears throat] Oh, I forgot, you don't see in nine dimensions. There's just a lot of... there's a lot of tension in the air right now.
Eleanor: Are you okay, buddy? You seem kind of stressed.
Michael: No, no, no, I'm fine. Top of my game, actually. Uh, here, let me just, uh... Have a seat. There you go. So to prepare to meet all of you, I studied the human concept of friends. I even watched all ten seasons of the show Friends. Boy, those Friends really were friends, weren't they? Although... and I realize this is the kind of observation that would only occur to the mind of an eternal being... How did they afford that apartment? A waitress and a chef with those Manhattan real estate prices.
Eleanor: Yeah, we were all confused about that too.

Jason: Dude, you got to come with us to the spa.
Chidi: No way. No, that's really weird. You can't make small talk with her for one day without being caught?
Jason: No, I can't, and she freaks me out. She's so pretty, like Nala from The Lion King. And she talks so smart, like, um... Nala from The Lion King. You got to help me.

Chidi: Quick summary of contractualism. Uh, imagine a group of reasonable people are coming up with the rules for a new society.
Eleanor: Like if your Uber driver talks to you, the ride should be free?
Chidi: Sure, but anyone can veto any rule that they think is unfair. So if you said, "We should be able to break our promises without any repercussions," someone would veto that rule.
Eleanor: Well, my first rule would be that no one can veto my rules.
Chidi: Well, that's called tyranny. And it's generally frowned upon. If you make a promise to someone, you should do it. Just like I promised to help you and still am, despite your constant mockery.
Eleanor: [mockingly] "Despite your constant mockery." Whatever, you love it.