Jason Quote #128

Quote from Jason in Jeremy Bearimy

Jason: Why don't you want your name on the opera house? I love getting my name on stuff. In Jacksonville, I got a flu virus named after me 'cause I kissed a bat on a dare.


‘Jeremy Bearimy’ Quotes

Quote from Jason

Tahani: This was a truly great plan.
Jason: Ah, thanks. Man, there are so many times that just this amount of money would have changed my life. I could have paid my rent. I could've gone to a real doctor instead of pretending I was a big dog so I could go to the vet.

Quote from Eleanor

Bartender: Look, there have to be rules. Every place has rules.
Eleanor: Ugh! Fine, here are my rules... Rule number one, I get to do whatever I want and you all just have to deal with it. Rule two, no more Spider-Man movies! There's way too many Spider-Man movies. Too many dorky, little, twerpy Spider-men. Rule three, everyone leave me alone.
Bartender: So you just take care of yourself? You don't owe anything to anyone else? [chuckles] If people lived that way, society would break down.
Eleanor: Yeah! In America, everyone does whatever they want society did break down, it's terrible, and it's great! You only look out for number one, scream at whoever disagrees with you, there are no bees because they all died, and if you need surgery, you just beg for money on the internet. It's a perfect system! Now get me another drink. Tomorrow's my birthday. Well, well, well, a wallet. [gasps] My rules say I get to take the cash out and keep it, because in my society, I do whatever I want 'cause I'm awesome. [removes cash] Just take it. Take it, Eleanor. Just... Ugh!

Quote from Michael

Michael: Agent Fuqua and I are... paranormal investigators. We're here to protect you from... demons. No, wait, that's real. Um... ghouls. Ghouls! We're here to protect you from ghouls. Now I had to appear in different disguises to keep tabs on you but you are all involved together in this FBI case. [Eleanor scoffs] No, we can... we can... prove this. We have detailed files on all of you. Ask Janet anything. [Janet gasps]
Eleanor: Who's Janet?
Michael: "Frenchy".
Janet: [whispers] Frenchy.
Michael: [scoffs] Sorry... "Frenchy's" nickname is Janet.
Tahani: I thought her nickname was "Frenchy".
Michael: It is. That's why they call her... Lisa "Double Nickname" Fuqua.

Jason Quotes

Quote from Dance Dance Resolution

Jason: Yo, yo, homies, check it. There's something messed up with this place. We keep fighting with each other. None of the TVs get the NFL RedZone channel. My soul mate doesn't even know who Blake Bortles is. I know this sounds crazy, but I think we're in the Bad Place.
Michael: Jason figured it out? Jason? This is a real low point. Yeah, this one hurts. Ow.

Quote from Dance Dance Resolution

Chidi: Michael, what do we do here?
Michael: I don't know. Apparently, the Bad Place knows that one of you actually belongs down there with them, and they want that person to get inside the obelisk, or they're gonna take all of you.
Jason: I can't go. I'm too young to die and too old to eat off the kids' menu. What a stupid age I am.

Quote from Leap to Faith

Jason: I can't believe Michael betrayed us again. Why is it always the ones you most expect?