Doug Forcett: It was 1972. My friend Randy and I ate some magic mushrooms. Randy asked me, "What do you think happens when you die?" And I saw with perfect clarity how the afterlife works. Immediately, I knew I had to live a perfect life. Well, not immediately. The next day all I could do was watch kung fu movies and stroke a blanket that I thought was my cat. But soon after, I designed a life that would maximize my point total and help me get into the Good Place. And I've been living it ever since. I know, this sounds crazy.
Michael: No! No, actually it makes... it makes perfect sense.
Doug Forcett: Oh. [chuckles] Oh, boy. You've been sitting here for ten minutes and I haven't offered you anything to eat or drink. Would you like some water or fresh radishes?
Michael: Water would be great.