Dorothy: Why would you want to spend Christmas with a bunch of total strangers?
Santa Claus: Well, it has to be better than spending it alone. See, Christmas for me is... Christmas has always been rotten and Ionely as long as I can remember. I always have the Christmas spirit, but no one ever seems to notice. I never get gifts, cards, dyed eggs.
Blanche: Dyed eggs? That's Easter.
Santa Claus: Another rotten holiday.

Santa Claus: Get away from the door. That's it. Alright now, why don't we get this celebration on its feet? Let's sing a few Christmas carols. Does everybody know "Silent Night"? Know it?
Meyer: Know it? I wrote it.
Blanche: You did not.
Meyer: Yes, I did. I'll prove it. [singing] Silent night Holy night
Santa Claus: Wow. What an honor. I want to shake your hand.

Santa Claus: Now, excuse me. Did you know that that guy who wrote "Silent Night" was the original choice for Potsie on Happy Days?
Dorothy: How the mighty have fallen.

Santa Claus: This place is always filled with such nice people. Years ago, when I, you know, had a problem, coming here always used to cheer me up. That's why I decided to come back and spend Christmas here. Oh, oh, oh. By the way, let's get to the presents. I brought enough for everybody.
Blanche: I can not believe we'll miss going home on account of him.
Dorothy: Ah, there's nothing we can do.
Santa Claus: Okay, everybody, here's your presents. I really hope you like them.
Rose: We don't want your presents.
Santa Claus: But it's Christmas.
Rose: Not for us. You've ruined our Christmas.
Dorothy: Rose!
Rose: I'll handle this, Dorothy. I'm not surprised that you always spend Christmas by yourself. You know why? Because you don't know what Christmas is all about. People don't owe you a nice Christmas because you decided that's what makes you happy. You can force us to stay here all night, but I'll be damned if you're going to force us to celebrate this joyous holiday with you.

Santa Claus: I feel so ashamed. Everything you said about me is true. I'm- I'm a loser.
Rose: You're not a loser, you just need some help.
Santa Claus: Maybe you're right.
Meyer: Mrs Nylund, I think a lot of what you said applies to me, too. My whole life has just been one lie after another. I realize now I was doing it just to get attention. I think maybe it's finally time for me to stop.
Rose: Mr Meyer, that's wonderful.
Sophia: Marvelous. Let's get going. I could've walked to New York by now.

Rose: Dr. Escobar, I'm so glad you're here. I don't have time to explain, but this gentleman here would like to talk to you. Merry Christmas.
Meyer: Dr. Escobar? Perhaps we should talk, too. I'm Dr. Rooney from the Mayo Clinic. I'd like to fill you in on the particulars of this man's case.

Blanche: Oh, I am chilled to the bone. I've never seen it be this cold in Miami.
Rose: You know, I think that storm is getting worse.
Dorothy: I disagree. I think the storm was at its worst when we ran out of gas and then had to run two blocks in the rain to get here.
Sophia: Incidentally, I appreciate everyone leaving me stranded after my heel fell off at the middle of that intersection.

Sophia: So we're a family, we're a family stuck in a diner on Christmas Eve.
Dorothy: Yeah, but at least we're together.
Blanche: Boy, I know I'm feeling better. My craving for cheesecake has returned.
Rose: That man was so nice to us. I wish there was something we could do for him.
Dorothy: Maybe there is. Uh, excuse me?
Albert: Yes, ma'am?
Dorothy: How would you like to go home for a little while and spend Christmas Eve with your family?
Albert: Oh, I'd love to, but-
Dorothy: If you trust us, we'd be happy to watch the place while you're gone.
Albert: Can you cook?
Sophia: Are you black?
Albert: Look, I promise I'll be back in less than an hour. Thank you and merry Christmas.