TV Quotes

Blanche: You know, Dorothy, I think maybe you're being too hard on her. I know how difficult buyin' shoes can be. Sometimes you get yourself a really good-looking salesman and you try to pretend you don't notice his hands caressing your calf as he tries to keep his mind on shoes, but all the time he's thinking, "Dare I peek? Dare I look more? Dare I look where no eyes have looked before?" And then, as he kneels there before you, little beads of perspiration breakin' out on his forehead, his breath comin' shorter and quicker, he ever so gently slips the supple leather on your quivering foot, and you achieve a perfect fit. Come on, old woman, we need shoes now!

Blanche: Sophia, there's somethin' I don't understand. Now, you're always a bit ornery, unpleasant, impolite, even downright mean. That's part of your charm.
Sophia: Thank you, you bed-hopping relic. [Blanche pops Sophia's balloon]

Rose: Wait a minute. If you didn't sleep with any of the men in these journals, then how come it says "Bed" on the cover?
Blanche: [laughs] Oh, that doesn't say "Bed."
Rose: Right there, it does.
Blanche: Oh, silly, those are my initials. Blanche Elizabeth Devereaux.
Dorothy: Your initials spell "Bed"?

Blanche: Wish me luck.
Dorothy: Wait. Blanche, why should you do it?
Blanche: Because we'll have a better chance. I happen to be a wonderful orator. And two of the commissioners can verify that.
Dorothy: Blanche, "orator" means "speaker".
Blanche: Really? Oh. Well, somebody else do the talking.