Rose Quote #1139
Miles: Rose, sweetheart, you don't understand. I'm- I'm here for cosmetic surgery.
Rose: Cosmetic surgery? Why?
Miles: Because I look old, Rose. Do you have any idea what it's like working on a college campus?
Rose: Well, I've never worked on one, but I was the subject of a lab experiment once.
Miles: Wait a minute, you never told me that.
Rose: They doubled my IQ. For three days, I was another Einstein. Then they pulled out the IV.
Miles: What was in that IV?
Rose: Smart juice, I guess.
Quote from Blanche
Rose: Well, I can't use this.
Dorothy: She's right. This violates the privacy of her relationship, and I think you should take it back.
Blanche: You're just trying to make that old stupid sweatshirt of yours look better. Besides I can't take it back.
I paid in advance.
Rose: Can't you get a refund?
Blanche: Well, no. I paid with nature's credit card.
Dorothy: You never leave home without it.
Quote from Dorothy
Blanche: Dorothy, if you're really so worried about this, well, I'll just let Rose open yours first so you won't be embarrassed.
Dorothy: You know, your ego is so fragile you have to turn everything into a popularity contest. Well, I have news for you. Today your worst nightmare happens. Today I make you look bad.
Blanche: You hate me 'cause I'm beautiful, don't you?
Dorothy: There's a man leaving in 10 minutes. Be under him.
Quote from Dorothy's New Friend
Rose: I remember when I was a little girl back in St. Olaf. There was this old lady who lived up the street. She never smiled. I mean, she always looked angry. The kids said she'd kill anyone who even stepped on her property. We called her Mean Old Lady Higgenlooper.
Blanche: Yeah, kids can be pretty cruel.
Rose: No. That was her name. Mean Old Lady Higgenlooper. She had it changed legally 'cause everybody called her that anyway.
Blanche: Then how come your name isn't Big Dummy?
Rose: Well, there were already three other people in town with that name. But that's beside the point. One day I got up the courage to go up to Mean Old Lady Higgenlooper and ask her why she always frowned. Well, she had been born with no smiling muscles. I pointed out that a frown is just a smile turned upside down. So from then on, whenever I'd go by, she'd stand on her head and wave.
Quote from Henny Penny - Straight, No Chaser
Blanche: This is horrible. As Big Daddy used to say, "I'm feeling lower than the rent on a burnin' building."
Rose: That's funny. I used to live in a burning building. And it was cheap. It was Charlie's and my first house. Well, scoff if you must, but it was warm and toasty. I'll never forget Charlie throwing me over his shoulder and dashing across the threshold. Oh, it was a beautiful place. Three bedrooms, two baths. Then two bedrooms and one bath. Eventually, we outgrew the place.