Blanche Quote #827
Blanche: I think over the past five years I might have forgotten to mention that y'all were living here with me and paying rent.
Dorothy: We just slipped your mind?
Blanche: Well, of course not, darling. But you know I think of you girls as family. Now, how would it look if they thought I was charging my own family rent?
Blanche: Don't you ever get nosebleed from taking the highroad all the time?
Quote from Sophia
Blanche: Anyway, I got good news from my accountant. I'm being audited Tuesday.
Dorothy: Oh, lucky you.
Blanche: Dorothy, you don't get it. My accountant reminded me that I've been audited before and I've never had to pay a penny in back taxes. I have a way with auditors. The last time I was audited I got money back from the government.
Sophia: Blanche, it's not a refund when the auditor leaves two twenties on your nightstand.
Quote from Blanche
Blanche: OK, Rose, I'm going to tell you a story about a young girl in high school who was very insecure about the other kids liking her. Now, she would do anything - anything - to gain their approval. She would do their homework for them, while her grades suffered. She would give them her lunch money, in the misguided belief that she could buy their acceptance. Finally, lonely and desperate for affection she gave her virginity to the first boy who showed her the slightest attention.
Dorothy: You know, Blanche, until you told this story, I never realized how much we had in common.
Blanche: We don't have anything in common. That was a story Sophia told me about you.
Quote from Hey, Look Me Over
Rose: Wait a minute. If you didn't sleep with any of the men in these journals, then how come it says "Bed" on the cover?
Blanche: [laughs] Oh, that doesn't say "Bed."
Rose: Right there, it does.
Blanche: Oh, silly, those are my initials. Blanche Elizabeth Devereaux.
Dorothy: Your initials spell "Bed"?
Quote from It's a Miserable Life
Blanche: Wish me luck.
Dorothy: Wait. Blanche, why should you do it?
Blanche: Because we'll have a better chance. I happen to be a wonderful orator. And two of the commissioners can verify that.
Dorothy: Blanche, "orator" means "speaker".
Blanche: Really? Oh. Well, somebody else do the talking.