Rose Quote #389
Quote from Rose in The Housekeeper
Dorothy: Look, Marguerite is a lovely person. She just cannot do the job.
Rose: [sighs] I hate to admit it, but you're right. We had a similar situation back in St. Olaf, with Mrs. Gunderson, our grade school teacher. Oh, she was the nicest woman you'd ever want to meet, but as the years went by, she got her facts a little confused. In biology class she started telling kids that the human body was made up of 80% Ovaltine. While we were studying WWI, she told us mustard gas was something you got from eating too many hot dogs. That's why to this day in St. Olaf, everyone celebrates the 4th of July with a thin omelet on a bun.
Dorothy: What do you say after we fire Marguerite, we each chip in and get Rose a CAT scan.
Features in the collection: Tales of St. Olaf.
The Golden Girls Quotes
‘Tales of St. Olaf’
Quote from Rose in Dorothy's New Friend
Rose: I remember when I was a little girl back in St. Olaf. There was this old lady who lived up the street. She never smiled. I mean, she always looked angry. The kids said she'd kill anyone who even stepped on her property. We called her Mean Old Lady Higgenlooper.
Blanche: Yeah, kids can be pretty cruel.
Rose: No. That was her name. Mean Old Lady Higgenlooper. She had it changed legally 'cause everybody called her that anyway.
Blanche: Then how come your name isn't Big Dummy?
Rose: Well, there were already three other people in town with that name. But that's beside the point. One day I got up the courage to go up to Mean Old Lady Higgenlooper and ask her why she always frowned. Well, she had been born with no smiling muscles. I pointed out that a frown is just a smile turned upside down. So from then on, whenever I'd go by, she'd stand on her head and wave.
Quote from Rose in Older and Wiser
Rose: Well, it wasn't unnatural in St. Olaf. We not only took care of our old people, we revered them, honored them, put them on a pedestal. 'Course, that's how we got to be the broken hip capital of the Midwest.
‘The Housekeeper’ Quotes
Quote from Sophia
Marguerite: What is she talking about?
Sophia: Don't play dumb with me. I've been known to cast a curse myself. Do you think Shelley Long was really tired of playing in Cheers? Wrong, baby. I was tired of her!
Quote from Rose
Blanche: I wonder what this is.
Rose: I'll bet it's a love potion.
Dorothy: Ah, Rose, come on, honey. There's no such thing as a love potion.
Rose: Sure there is, Dorothy. My grandparents got together because of a love potion. Well, actually it was a foot salve Gramps accidentally swallowed. You see, Grandma was the nurse who pumped his stomach, but she was new and she attached the nozzle to the wrong place. Next thing you know, they were engaged.
Quote from Rose
Marguerite: A tiara? [Blanche and Dorothy look to Rose]
Rose: Well, you said to get something I'd buy for myself. You see, I've always wanted a tiara. I mean, ever since I was a little girl back in St. Olaf. I mean, every year I'd blow out my birthday candles and wish for one. And every year I'd get a freshly-carved pair of wooden shoes. Except for one year, during the Depression when I just got a block of coal, which I carved into a pair of high-top Keds.