Rose: I understand what you went through, Dorothy. I remember how I felt when I thought Charlie was cheating on me.
Blanche: Charlie?
Rose: We'd been married for 18 years. And up until then, everything had seemed so perfect. Then one night it happened. He came home, had dinner, walked upstairs and went to sleep. I went in the bathroom and cried my eyes out.
Dorothy: Rose, I don't want to encourage long stories, but it seems in this story you left out the...
Blanche: The story.
Dorothy: That's the word.
Rose: Well, Charlie went right to sleep. We didn't, well, you know...
Blanche: Oh, and he'd promised?
Rose: No! It's just that that was the first time that had ever happened in 18 years of married life.
Blanche: Get out of here.
Dorothy: You mean to say that every night without fail for 18 years, you and Charlie...
Rose: Yeah, of course. Right after dinner.
Blanche: Well, no wonder you never heard of I Love Lucy.
Rose: Of course, as it turned out, I was just overreacting. I mean, it was a freak, one-time thing. By the next morning, everything was back to normal.
Blanche: By morning? You mean to tell me, that every morning?
Rose: Charlie said that's why we didn't have headaches and we both had really shiny hair.
Blanche: Listen, Rose, no offense, but I find that story a little hard to believe. You don't even like to talk about sex.
Rose: Well, it's been my experience that people who talk about it a lot don't do it very often.
Blanche: Coffee, anyone?

Stan: I'll be honest with you Kate, I never liked him. From the moment that worm slithered into your live, I knew he was no good. What kind of a man has so little respect for the institution of marriage that he can cheat on a wonderful woman and jump into bed with the first available bimbo who comes along?
Dorothy: But enough about you, Stanley.

Dorothy: Oh, Blanche. Blanche, why do they do it? Why do men do it and think they can get away with it?
Blanche: Same reason a dog licks himself, Dorothy. Because he can.