‘Mrs. George Devereaux’
Season 6, Episode 9 - Aired November 17, 1990
Blanche is shocked when her late husband, George, appears and claims to have faked his own death. Meanwhile, Dorothy catches the attention of two celebrities.
Quote from Blanche
Dorothy: Oh, Blanche, just out of curiosity, were "they" in the dream?
Blanche: As crazy about you as ever.
Dorothy: I'm sorry I'm laughing, but the idea of me with one of those two is just so silly.
Blanche: You picked Sonny this time.
Dorothy: Yes! Well, good night.
Blanche: Good night, Dorothy. Good night, George.
Quote from Sophia
Blanche: I just feel so horrible. Why do men do this? Why do they deceive us?
Sophia: Picture it - Germany, 1922.
Rose: Germany? Were you on vacation, Sophia?
Sophia: Spy. Eh, it was a summer job. Anyway, while in Heidelberg, XQ-37 - that's me - meets a man of science.
He gives me classified documents, I give him, well, a peek at the hinterland. It's an epic love till it falls to shambles in utter deception.
Blanche: He wasn't a man of science?
Sophia: He wasn't a man.
Dorothy: You're making this up, XQ! I can't believe that you were ever a spy.
Sophia: I can't believe I told you. Well, I guess I'm gonna have to kill you.
Quote from Rose
Rose: Someone was actually able to deceive me once.
Sophia: Do tell, Rose.
Rose: St. Olaf's most famous OB/MAG.
Dorothy: What's that?
Rose: Obstetrician/magician. The Amazing Shapiro. He delivered Bridget. But it was so confusing. "It's a girl! Now it's a dove! Now it's a glass of milk!" I don't know how he got her in that deck of cards, but there she was, right after the King of Hearts. "Is this your baby?"
Quote from Blanche
Rose: Blanche, look at all these flowers!
Sophia: Oh, my God. Who died? Did one of us die?
Blanche: They're mine, Sophia. They're from a secret admirer.
Dorothy: Ma, look. I got flowers. Two bouquets of lousy, stinking flowers.
Blanche: They're from my secret admirer, Dorothy. Do you like 'em? Every single one of 'em?
Quote from Sophia
Rose: Oh, Dorothy, you mustn't feel so bad. Why, this is a big day for you, too. A girl always remembers the first time she gets flowers.
Dorothy: Rose, I am a woman in my 50s. I mean, common sense says that I have gotten flowers before.
Sophia: So, Dorothy, tell me. Are those flowers from men? Are they? Huh? Are they?
Quote from Blanche
George: Blanche, honey, please.
Blanche: Oh, my God. What in hell? Why do you look like that? I don't believe this!
Dorothy: What? Blanche, Blanche, who is this?
Blanche: If I didn't know better, I would say my dead husband, George.
Dorothy: Well, George. We've heard so much about you.
Quote from Dorothy
Blanche: Let's just change the subject, OK? If we're done with our journey to the land of make-believe, my secret admirer wants me to meet him for lunch.
Dorothy: Oh, Blanche, I can't believe you're gonna do it. I mean, sure, the flowers are nice, but are you sure you know what you're getting yourself into?
Blanche: Oh, come on, Dorothy, how much trouble can I get into in a public place?
Dorothy: How soon we forget the Greyhound terminal incident.
Quote from Sophia
Lyle Waggoner: Yes, it's me. Lyle Waggoner. No autographs.
Sophia: No problem.
Quote from Sophia
Rose: Blanche, George followed you all the way home. You have to talk to him.
Sophia: He's alive, all right. I poked him with a stick.
Quote from Blanche
Blanche: But, George, I arranged your funeral. The eulogy, the flowers. I even watched 'em put you in the family mausoleum.
George: Well, what can I say, Blanche? Thanks.
Sonny Bono: Hi-ho, everybody. It's me, Sonny.
Blanche: Oh, God!
Sonny Bono: Is Dorothy around?
Blanche: She's out on the lanai.
Sonny Bono: I suppose you're wondering why a man like Sonny Bono-
Blanche: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. On the lanai.