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It's a Miserable Life

‘It's a Miserable Life’

Season 2, Episode 4 -  Aired November 1, 1986

When the girls make a petition to save an old oak tree in the neighborhood, they go up against their miserable, bitter neighbor, Mrs. Claxton.

Quote from Rose

Woman: Today is a day of great sadness. Not only for me, but also for the people whose lives have been touched by the warmth and the kindness of this woman who is lying here. I wish I knew how many charities and hospitals and orphanages have benefited from her generosity. But now, no-one will ever know. Because she preferred to do all of her good work anonymously. I'm sure a lot of people never even knew that she worked for 15 years in a leper colony. Yes, Celia Rubinstein loved all mankind. She was-
Dorothy: Who?!
Woman: Celia Rubinstein.
Blanche: This funeral isn't for Celia Rubinstein. It's for Frieda Claxton.
Mr. Pfeiffer: The Rubinstein funeral's down the hall.
Woman: I'm so sorry for the intrusion. Frieda Claxton? Wasn't she the woman that owned that old house on Richmond Street?
Rose: Yes.
[The woman kicks the casket]

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Quote from Rose

Rose: I guess you were all right. Frieda Claxton didn't have a friend in the world. She didn't make any difference to anybody. She might as well never even have existed.
Blanche: Oh, Rose, honey.
Sophia: Let her be by herself.

Quote from Dorothy

Dorothy: Well, at least we can feel good we've done the right thing. Mrs. Claxton is in somebody else's hands now.
Mr. Pfeiffer: Well, I'm afraid for the moment she's in mine.
Blanche: What?
Mr. Pfeiffer: Well, it seems there was a little mix-up out back and Mrs. Claxton was cremated by mistake. We never should have hired a high-school student.
Dorothy: Oh, well, whatever.
Mr. Pfeiffer: Uh, ladies, you're forgetting something.
Blanche: What?
Mr. Pfeiffer: Mrs. Claxton. We can't keep her.

Quote from Rose

Rose: Mrs. Claxton, we want you to know we all appreciate you helping us to save the tree.
Mrs. Claxton: I'm not. I'm here to make sure they tear it down. I hate trees. I hate people.
Blanche: Well, Mrs. Claxton, Rose told us you said you were going to help us.
Mrs. Claxton: That's right.
Dorothy: And now you're not?
Mrs. Claxton: That's right.
Rose: Well, why did you lie?
Mrs. Claxton: To get the Danish.

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