Rose: I can't believe it. You're a fake.
Enrique Mas: I am not a fake. Mrs. Nylund, ever since I was a little boy, I wanted to be on TV. Do you know what that's like for a Hispanic kid? Who were my role models? Zorro and Ricky Ricardo. A gay caballero and a man who couldn't recognize his own wife in a fake mustache. I swore that if I ever got on TV, I would maintain the highest standards. Enrique Mas demands the best.
Rose: Well, hold it right there! You can't write me off just because I'm not 30-something. I have experience. And wisdom. And insight. I'd be perfect for this job. You see, I am the battered consumer. I drive a Gremlin, for God's sake.