Joanne: Seriously, Barry? Come on.
Barry: You come on. Why did you laugh at me as James Bond?
Joanne: Because it was hysterical.
Barry: But I was equal parts dangerous and sexy.
Joanne: You weren't, okay? I love you so much that I bent over backwards to make you feel better. So maybe the problem isn't that I laughed but that you're too insecure to laugh at yourself. Ugh.

Coach Nick: Beverly, this puff is heavenly. What's in it?
Beverly: Oh, just butter, lard, oil, flour, cheese, bacon, more cheese, and beef drippings.
Coach Nick: Beef drippings? That's what Mama used to feed me as a baby.

Murray: It's dark out, there are people in my house, and I don't like it.
Beverly: It's called a mingle party, Murray. So mingle.
Erica: And do I really need to be here for your little lesson on the sanctity of marriage?
Beverly: Yes. You're gonna witness firsthand how love always wins.
Murray: Can love win in the basement with the TV on?

Murray: Hey, what's going on?
Beverly: Honestly, I don't know. I thought marriage was supposed to last forever.
Murray: Aw, come on. [Beverly sighs] Erica knows better than that.
Beverly: I'm not worried about Erica. I'm worried about us.
Murray: Us?
Beverly: Mike's lazy, Fran nags. She speaks her mind, he's a pill. Their kids go off to college, and immediately they grow apart. I mean, I know it sounds crazy, but are we that different?
Murray: Bevy, that's ridiculous.
Beverly: Is it? They thought the same thing once, too.

Barry: JTP and Adam.
All: JTP!
Adam: And Adam, I guess.
Barry: Joanne has brought something to my attention that has shaken me to my rock-hard core. Be honest. Would you describe me as sensitive?
Andy: I would describe you as handsome and powerful.
Matt: Yeah. Wanna tackle me?
Naked Rob: Tackle me, too, Big Tasty.
Andy: Always down for a Barry tackle.
Barry: Damn it, it's true. You're all just triple "P"-ing me. I saw the chalkboard.
Adam: Aw, why did Joanne take it with her?

Matt: But we care about you and want to protect you. Even though sometimes it's at our own expense.
Adam: We aren't honest with you because it's easier. But what Joanne did, telling you the truth, laughing in the face of a wild-card lunatic... that took guts.
Barry: Okay. But from now on, I'd rather have a little dose of honesty from you guys too.
Matt: Nope. Our system works.
Andy: If it ain't broke.
Adam: I'm going to college soon.

Barry: Hey. I was hoping you'd be here.
Joanne: It really didn't seem that way the past few days.
Barry: Sorry. I was jealous of your relationship with James Bond.
Joanne: A fictional character, but go on.
Barry: [sighs] It also seems I'm deeply insecure. And even though it hurts, the good thing is I know you'll always tell me the truth.
Joanne: Always. Like if it was between you and 007, I'd pick you every time.
Barry: Really?
Joanne: Really. [British accent] Why, Mr. Goldberg, can I fix you something? Coffee, tea... me?
Barry: Get over here.

Erica: Well, I just finished my vows. Want to take a look?
Barry: Did you mention that marriage is nothing but a silly farce until you die?
Erica: Just read.
Beverly: "I can't wait to be your partner for life, your best friend, the person you grow old with. Some people say marriage is hard, but I know it won't be for me because I'll be married to you." Erica, this is so beautiful.
Erica: It's because Dad helped me.

Beverly: You helped her with this?
Murray: Eh, the girl transcribed some grunts.
Beverly: So you're never gonna leave me?
Murray: Bevy, we're not like those other people. You are my everything. Just don't make a big deal out of it. [they hug]
Beverly: [shouts] I'm your everything! [both laugh]