Trending ‘The Goldbergs’ Quotes

Quote from Erica in Goldberg on The Goldbergs

Erica: Look, I am not depressed or angry or in denial. I'm just in a long-distance relationship.
Srini: Oh, of course. All the signs were there. You're a textbook BORF!
Other Erica: For sure. Total BORF.
Erica: Okay, what the hell is a BORF?
Srini: It stands for "Boyfriend Obsessed Reject Freshman." That's you.
Erica: I am not a BORF!

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Quote from Murray in Pretty in Pink

Murray: I think you're more like that one with the Ronald McDonald hair.
Adam: You mean Molly Ringwald?
Murray: Melanie Grizwald.
Adam: Molly. Ringwald.
Murray: I don't hear a difference.
Adam: You should.
Murray: Yeah, well... She just shows up and everything worked out, just like it can for you.
Adam: I don't know, prom already started.
Murray: Didn't stop Mopsy Rainbird.
Adam: Dad, I appreciate it, but life doesn't work out like in the movies.
Murray: Usually not. But every once in a while, you get a movie moment. And whether you do something with it... Well, that's up to you.

Quote from Murray in Circle of Driving

Murray: All right, stop your pouting. I got you something, and I think you're gonna like it.
Barry: REO speedwagon? This is Top 40! You don't know me at all. I'm into rap, the poetry of the streets. Come on!
Murray: No, no, I talked to the guy at Sam Goody. He said it was a hip track.
Barry: Well, did you talk to Sam Goody himself? Huh? Did you? No. You talked to a random jack-off who knows nothing about real music.
Murray: You weren't there, okay? The guy had an earring, he had a Jean jacket, covered in buttons. Covered!

Quote from Murray in I Caddyshacked the Pool

Murray: Hey, how are you doing?
Adam: Why are you in my room?
Murray: Just came by to say hi, and (mumbles).
Adam: What?
Murray: (mumbles)
Adam: What?
Murray: Y'know, (mumbles "you've got a beautiful body").
Adam: See, you keep trailing off specifically at the end.
Murray: You've got a beautiful body! This body of yours, beautiful.
Adam: Don't ever tell me that again!
Murray: Deal. But, let's be truthful. You don't have a beautiful body.
Adam: Thanks.
Murray: You're in middle school. Your body, it's stinky and greasy, and it's growing too fast. And, when you talk, it's like a broken kazoo. Those days were horrible. I remember them, I really do.
Adam: Since when have you had a shred of insecurity about your body? You'll go anywhere in your Tighty-Whities.
Murray: That's now. When I was your age, I hated my body. The good news is, I grew up and life beat me down so hard, I eventually stopped caring. And some day, life will crap on you so hard that you'll stop caring too.
Adam: That's oddly reassuring.
Murray: Trust me. Eventually you'll realize it doesn't matter what other people think.

Quote from Barry in The Hooters

Beverly: Pull it together, Geoff. If we don't do something, Erica's gonna leave Jenkintown behind to experience the world and become an interesting person.
Geoff: But how do we stop it?
Barry: You can't stop it. Your only choice is to become it.
Beverly: Barry, no. That brie wheel is for an entire party.
Barry: I can now handle the richest of party cheeses since I've become accustomed to how the other half lives. Now, pardon me, and prepare to be amazed, as I drink this water.
Geoff: [gasps]
Beverly: He said it right. How, Barry?

Quote from Pops in Call Me When You Get There

Pops: Easy. Little more. Whoa!
Adam: Pull your robe down.
Pops: It's a kimono.
Adam: Pull your kimono down.
Pops: It's designed to be showy.
Adam: Well, it's working.
Pops: Just don't look down!
Adam: What did I just see? It was like a Robin's nest!
Pops: It's an unflattering angle.
Adam: What's going on down there?
Pops: Stop looking down and get me to the couch already!

Quote from Murray in A Wrestler Named Goldberg

Murray: Okay, let me show you a real move. This was my specialty back in the day. You use your opponent's weight and strength against him.
Barry: You smell like sandwich.
Murray: Shut up.

Quote from Murray in The 'Dirty Dancing' Dance

Pops: You're finally watching that movie, huh?
Murray: I know I promised I'd take Bevy out dancing, but I can't do it. I'll look stupid.
Pops: Since when do you care about how you look? You spend half your life puttering around this house in your underpants.
Murray: Well, that's about comfort. It's also a warning shot to outsiders that you're not welcome.
Pops: All I'm saying is, you always care less about what other people think. Why is this different?
Murray: Let me be honest with you. [sighs] I don't like to move my body.
Pops: Yeah, we've met.

Quote from Matt in So Swayze It's Crazy

Barry: This is all your fault, Matt Bradley. Wait, what are you wearing?
Matt: Yeah, watching you try too hard to be punk made me realize I need to mellow out. That's why I'm a Deadhead now.
Barry: The Grateful Dead is the opposite of punk.
Matt: For sure. If you ask me, you guys need a chill member of the JTP.
All: JTP.

Quote from Coach Mellor in A Night to Remember

Barry: I can't believe it. My girlfriend just broke up with me.
Coach Mellor: I know. We all know. There were hundreds of your judgy peers watching.
Barry: What am I gonna do?
Coach Mellor: Come on. Bring it in for a two-person huddle. Let Coach give you a pep talk with his body.
Barry: [crying]
Coach Mellor: That's it. You soak that rayon shirt down with your boy tears until you feel the strength return.