Beverly: [gasps] It's from my father's attorney.
Bill Lewis: Attorney, you say?
Erica: It's postmarked for almost two months ago.
Barry: My real inheritance! Pops gave me that dumb pen so I can endorse the $10,000, gold certificate that clearly fits inside this!
Murray: Ah, give it to me. Moron. "Dear Goldberg Family, this letter is to inform you that it was Albert Solomon's final wish "that you join together in spreading his ashes in his favorite place."
Barry: That's it? Check the back for a treasure map or a deed to a silver mine.
Murray: Nothin'.

Beverly: The truth is, your grandfather was very proud to have served, but the French people he found to be filthy [bleep].

Beverly: Of course it's fake! Horses don't hold gavels! Murray, how could you?
Murray: I'm sorry. It's just that everyone's having such a hard time.
Beverly: It's supposed to be hard. We lost somebody we love.
Murray: But no one's dealing with it. Y-Y-You're suddenly calling yourself an orphan and you won't go out with your friends. And Erica hates every wedding venue because they're all missing the same thing. Her grandfather.
Geoff: Is that true?
Murray: And Barry hates that pen because it makes him think that Pops was disappointed in him somehow. And this one's carrying around a doll and calling it Pops so he can pretend he never died at all.
Beverly: [voice breaking] Fine. We're not handling this well. But we're not all built like you, Murray.
Murray: No. I'm worse than all of you, because I haven't been able to face this at all.
Beverly: What are you saying?
Murray: The guy who gave me my business, my family, my happiness, he... he's gone forever, and I don't know the first thing to do.
Adam: You really miss him, too?
Murray: Of course I miss him. I'm sorry I haven't talked about it. It's just so damn hard. [Adam hugs Murray]

Adam: Bar, that's the pen Pops used to write Grandma with when he was away during the war. In every letter, he promised he'd come home safely. And when he did, he said she'd better be ready to marry him.
Barry: How do you know all that?
Adam: I know everything about him. He was my best friend.
Barry: I-I wish I got to know him like that. I feel like I messed that up.
Adam: You had your own special thing with him, and it meant the world to him. That's why he wanted you to have that pen.
Shorty: This is why Al would brag about you guys all the time. So much love.
Adam: You know, if we want, we can still spread some ashes. I'm pretty sure I do know Pops' favorite place.
Beverly: You knew all along?
Adam: Just seemed easier to have an adventure than to say goodbye.

Virginia Kremp: Oh, hi, Beverly. How are you?
Beverly: How are most orphans? Oh, that's right... parentless.
Virginia Kremp: I know. I lost my mom and dad a few years back, so...
Beverly: To a car accident? You are never gonna know the pain of losing someone who passes quietly in their sleep.
Essie Karp: Well, you're obviously still hurting, but we thought it might be nice for you to get out and take a walk.
Beverly: Oh, did you?
Essie Karp: "We." I... D-Did you hear me say "we"?
Linda Schwartz: I-It was her idea.
Virginia Kremp: She was most insistent.
Beverly: Essie, could you for once consider someone else's feelings? Your parents may be extremely unlikable, but they are still alive.
Virginia Kremp: Okay, well, if you change your mind...
Beverly: I will not change my mind. [closes door]

Beverly: If you're looking for me, I will be sitting in the dark bedazzling black rhinestones.
Murray: Yeah, a sandwich sounds great.
Bill Lewis: Poor Bev, still having a hard time.
Murray: Nah, she's good. She cried at the thing.

Bill Lewis: Erica's dismissiveness suggests she's also struggling.
Murray: Eh, she just doesn't like people. It's how I raised her.

Barry: Erica's not the one with strong emotions.
Bill Lewis: Son, is that a French toast skewer?
Barry: I'm too angry to idly sit and eat. From now on, all my meals will be on sticks to allow for constant movement.
Bill Lewis: I know better than to ask, but why?
Barry: Pops had an awesome watch that commemorated the first 12 Super Bowls. [moves arm like the hour hand of a clock] Super Bowl One, Super Bowl Two, Super Bowl Three...
Bill Lewis: This one's seeking a medical degree?
Barry: Did he leave me that cherished heirloom? No. That went to Adam. And I got this?! He knew the only thing I hate more than reading is writing. He knew.

Bill Lewis: Barry's also not dealing with his grief. Instead of crying, he's raging and eating food in an unconventional manner.
Murray: He's always angry and eating stuff on sticks.
Bill Lewis: Mur, after the hubbub of my dad's funeral, that's when the sadness really hit. I didn't know how to deal with it.
I'd spend hours digging large holes for no reason. I even gave away our Swarovski crystal frog collection.
Murray: Crystal frogs?
Bill Lewis: You'd be surprised at people's affection for glass amphibians. Any hand-blown woodland creature, really. A bear, a moose, a raccoon, spunky chipmunk. But that's not the point.
Murray: I would hope not.
Bill Lewis: I finally got around to my dad's last wish. My wife and I spread his ashes around an oak tree. It was his favorite spot. Now, I put it off because I was afraid to say goodbye. But sure enough, once I faced it, I felt better.
Murray: I wasn't listening, but that had the rhythm of you being done.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] It was September 22nd, 1980-something. Thanks to Bill, my dad's secret plan to help us grieve was in motion.
Bill Lewis: Hey, Mur!
Murray: Hello, Bill, my trusted friend who never lies. What brings you to this neck of the woods?
Bill Lewis: Well, I was just out patrolling the area for our community watch. We've had a few gruesome stabbings.
Geoff: Oh, no!
Erica: Stabbings?
Beverly: Told them not to put in that new bus stop.
Murray: Gee, Bill, that's a lot of terrifying information, but I'm sure that's not the reason you came over here.
Bill Lewis: Back on track. I spotted this envelope over in your begonias.
Murray: Mailman must have dropped it, and it blew away or something.