Murray Quote #682
Murray: Admit it. Admit I was right about the cantaloupe.
Pops: Well, I came to the dance with Honeydew, but it looks like I'm going home with Cantaloupe.
Adam: Forget the melon!
Beverly: Nothing like a nice cantaloupe, am I right?
Pops: That's a nice melon.
Murray: I am so proud of that melon.
Pops: It's a nice melon.
Adam: Gah!! You stupid melon farmers are ruining this movie!
Beverly: Mmm, that is so yummy.
Murray: Hey, pass me some of that cantaloupe.
Quote from Barry
Barry: Okay, I've been listening to the Christmas radio station nonstop for five minutes, and I know exactly what we need to give Bill and Lainey.
Barry: It's all right there in the "The Twelve Days of Christmas" song. Erica, Geoffrey, write this down.
Geoff: On it!
Barry: First up, we need a Partridge Family CD.
Erica: I think you mean partridge in a pear.
Barry: Buh-bup! We also need 12 Willis Drummonds, 11 Roddy Pipers, 10 Laineys dancing.
Beverly: It's "ladies dancing." Why would Lainey's name be in a song from 200 years ago?
Erica: That's where this breaks down for you, Mom?
Barry: We also need nine Cloris Leachmans, eight maids a sweeping, seven Sprites for swigging, six 6-piece nuggets, five onion rings, four Larry Birds, three french fries, two leather gloves, and, of course, a Partridge Family CD.
Geoff: I'll get the fries, nuggets, Sprite, and Larry Bird. I guess!
Quote from Murray
Adam: "Melon farmer"?
Murray: What the hell's a melon farmer?
Pops: Someone who farms melons.
Murray: You think someone's sole profession is farming melons? Only melons?
Adam: Forget the melon farming! They changed it for TV.
Murray: Al, listen to me. Nobody farms just melons. Melons and grapes, maybe. But not just melons. That's ridiculous.
Pops: Well, what do you know from melons?
Murray: Oh, I know melons. I got a beautiful cantaloupe cut up in the fridge.
Pops: Cantaloupe? Of all the melons, that's the one you go with?
Murray: You got a better melon?
Murray: Honeydew?! [chuckles] That's madness. Hey, Bevy, bring your father a forkful of that cantaloupe.
Beverly: Somebody call for a forkful of cantaloupe?
Adam: I'm getting sick and tired of the melon talk.
Murray: Eat the forkful, Al. You'll see what I mean.
Pops: Oh, that is good.
Adam: Enough with the melons. Just watch the movie.
Quote from Dinner with the Goldbergs
Adult Adam: [v.o.] It was now decision-making time. And for my dad, the only choice was how to save money.
Murray: Okay, it's time for Murray's menu rules. Remember, no prime cuts, no fancy sides, no out-of-season vegetables, no market price, no salad bar, no items in French, no dry-aged anything, and, most importantly...
All: No appetizers of any kind, 'cause that's how they screw ya.
Geoff: Does that include a nice soup?
Murray: Are you for real? Is he for real? You're gonna eat a little meal before you eat a big meal? How many meals do you need?
Quote from A Chorus Lie
Erica: How is it my fault that every guy in our school is an unbearable moron?
Lainey: That's another thing. You gotta stop calling everyone a moron.
Murray: Morons! You're being too loud! Find another house to stupid up.
Barry: Oh my God, you're just like Dad! Way to go, Mur-man. Years of calling everyone on the planet a moron has poisoned your daughter's love life, and left her cold and alone.
Murray: So you're telling me that I've raised a daughter who doesn't want to date dumbass high school boys?
I think I've done my job.